Hi Journal & Friends,
It's time. Time to shift emphasis, to progress. To get out of the planning/anticipating/dreaming phase, and get on to the DOING phase.
All of you who post about there being all the time in the world, that this is not a race, and all that... well, that's great for you who are younger.
For me? I am VERY aware of the clock. Of the fact that I have a finite number of days left. And I want them to be glorious!
I want them to be spectacular! I don't want to have one more regret... one more thing that I "wished" I had tried, but procrastinated, or waited, or was too fearful to do.
So it's time. Time for me to face down my resistance to change and declare that not only am I "saying" I am a Warrior, but I am DOING a Warrior... if you know what I mean, LOL!
I got too comfortable in my routines. I felt safe. Predictable. I had my little blog format... I knew that on Sunday I would post a favorite photo... some Fridays I could post a Friday Favorite... occasionally on Tuesday I would put up a Toon Tuesday. I knew how to do a google search for nice little photos for my nice little posts.
I was in my comfort zone. I had my safe little world, thank you very much. And I didn't want to rock the boat!!
Well... whether I liked it or not, my little boat got rocked!
As I have admitted, I was struggling last week in all areas. Oh, no major binge blow-outs, like I would have done in the past. But for where I am NOW, eating maintenance portions of on-program food is NOT acceptable. And I slacked off on exercise, only meeting half of my goal for each day.
So here I am, feeling bad enough about all that, and trying to get honest enough with myself to get to the bottom of it... and of course I go and start yet another "self-help" book. I didn't expect much... it was just one I had heard about for years and never read, and I was between fiction stories, so why not...
Well! I'll go into which one it was in another post... that's not the point here. But it surprised me with it's content, and shook up my point of view, and showed where I was wrong in some of my thinking... harrumph!!!
It rocked my already rocking boat, to the point that I started to accept the fact that I needed to "embrace the change", as one dear blog friend told me to do.
And then.... it happened. That "thing" that happens to me every so often, if I am open and teachable, and willing to learn and... here's that word again... change.
From no less than EIGHT different sources, I got the same message. EIGHT! Even a stubborn hard head like ME can get that message.
I was stuck in my routine... my commitment... my plan... to change it felt like failure... it felt wrong.
I said recently that I needed to learn Flexibility. Well, here's my opportunity.
Ms PJ Geek told me recently in a comment: "Hang in there... Dr Phil's comment 'Stay real and stay flexible', seems perfect for you right now. When you are ready to change the time management stuff, it will change."
I am ready. I am ready to face it, to stop resisting change, to embrace change.
Mary from Wistful Nebulae has lost her weight, reached her goal, and is LIVING her passion now. She told me:
"Change is scary and uncomfortable. Know that. There must be one thing on that list bigger than the discomfort. Something that you think, 'wow'. That's what you start with...
Weight loss teaches us what happens if we give up and what happens if we don't. We all have to pay our dues. It's a beautiful thing. A rite of passage.
Have the guts to do what thousands of others think about but don't do. Sure, I get some mud slung at me, but so what. I'm doing it and they're not. Who really wins? I do. Because I have the guts to do. It's the definition of courage - it scares the piss out of me but I do it anyway. Why? It's who I am. I deserve to be who I am. When I let myself be what I should have always been, I'm happy.
Are you doing something for accolades or because you love it? If it's for love, it doesn't matter what anyone else on the planet thinks. It really doesn't. Do it for love, and others will respond to your passion. Realize there is a learning curve. Realize that being in the game is exhilarating - filled with highs and lows. But being in the game is where I once dreamed to be and where thousands of others dream to be. It hurts sometimes, but I'm living my life. I'm alive and it feels fantastic...
Your passions will light you up from the inside. It will spill over into everything you do. When you're lit up, everyone around you gets a better version of you.
So, find a way to do, Loretta."
I've been bugging Mary to do a guest post... well, I guess she just did! Wasn't that inspiring?!! She is a writer, and you can read some of her short stories HERE. My favorite is "Plantgirl".
So, I am going to do what Mary said... I am going to DO. And to DO that, I need more free time. And to get more free time, I will be blogging less.
I won't be offended at all if anyone stops reading... I understand. But I don't want to just write about living, I want to LIVE IT. Therefore, starting tomorrow in the fresh, shiny new month of September, my tentative new plan is to blog 4 days per week. And the other days will be put towards my art.
I hope my bloggy friends will stick with me... I have come to care for you all... you are REAL to me! This new schedule should also give me more time to visit all my favorite bloggy friends. I don't want to be a "taker", but also a "giver". You all have been so wonderfully supportive, and you in return deserve my support!
September... a shiny new month of fresh starts and grand experiments!
Today's Peek at the Past (Holy cannoli! This couldn't be more perfect for today! In fact, it was so perfect, I almost cried.)
From Day 22, August 31, 2009:
I may be late getting to the party, but I accept the invitation. And I am grateful to be invited, and given a chance to enjoy it with the music turned up, singing and dancing and celebrating the possibilities all the way out! I have plans...big plans...dreams...hopes...visions...daring and exciting. What have I got to lose to at least try???
To those who have been given this chance at a younger age, I would say: GRAB IT!! Give it your absolute ALL. Make this YOUR time, and let nothing dash your dreams. We don't control most of what happens TO us in life, but we have ABSOLUTE control over how we respond, which will make all the difference in the world in our thinking and our choices and how we interact with others...and ultimately, our future. Be bold!! Don't let the years slip away...Muster up all the courage inside of you, ignite the fires of enthusiasm, and go for it now!!!
(For complete post "Question One & Mud or Stars" click HERE)
From Dr Phil's book: "Get off your duff and get moving."
My verse for today: "How priceless is your unfailing love!"
My quote for today: "Character consists of what you do on the third and fourth tries." --John Albert Michener
Enjoy the Journey,