Sept 23rd... Knocked Down Again, Gettin' Up Again

Yesterday was tough. I felt beat up, beat down, and ready to “accept” that this was the way it was. This was it.

I felt like I was becoming a professional patient, with 2 to 4 medical appointments a week. It drained all my energy just to keep up, with nothing left over for my hopes and dreams. 

I asked someone about it, and they gave me logic. Well, when you get older, this is just the way it is… that kind of thinking. I felt defeated and in tears.

This morning a thought hit me: but what does God say about it??

I thought of verses that say things like “He will renew your youth like the eagle”. And “You will bear fruit even in old age”. But the doubts… oh the doubts. Was this for me? Even me? In spite of all my screw ups?

I opened my email this morning, and saw my Daily Promise, a newsletter I get with a verse for each day of the year. Of all 365 days, guess what I got THIS day??

“I will enrich your life and renew your youth like the eagle’s.”

That’s just too much coincidence for me to ignore!

Then, I happened to stumble on article (some link to another link to another link…) that had me in tears. The good kind. Here is one paragraph:

“Life will never be flawless. It will often slap us with humility and failures.

It’s a series of ups and downs. Getting smacks and punches are inevitable.

However, the desire of getting up should be stronger than those jabs.”

Link to whole article:

https://medium.com/the-mission/9-late-bloomer-success-stories-who-prove-its-never-too-late-to-achieve-your-dreams-b036688da6f

It tells about people who overcame adversity, even older people who achieved their dreams in spite of everything.

And it encouraged me. Greatly. If you need a shot in the arm of Encouragement today, I’d highly recommend carving out about 10 minutes to read and absorb this wonderful article.

"A Hope and a Future"

by Retta Stephenson 

This journey to health is not a straight line graph. Mine, at least, has had lots of ups and down. I'm so ready for some ups!

Continuing the journey,

Retta

APRIL 8th Oh noes, I Forgot!

I was thinking earlier today about how I am learning to be more honest in my art, to take the risk of "going deeper", being more vulnerable and not just doing only light-hearted stuff. It's all a part of my Journey to Wellness. To pursue the true passions of my heart. 

And it dawned on me, that I forgot to share what I've been up to over at my art blog! Now, I realize not everyone is interested, but some might be.  Back in Dec of 2012, I joined the Virtual Paintout  gang, and each month we travel via Google Street View to a new location. We get to pick whatever spot we like, and use it as the inspiration for our painting. For people who can't travel for whatever reason, this is sooo much fun! I feel like my wheelchair has wings, and I am traveling the world. :-)

So, below is my March painting. I call it "Moonlit Dreams Come True".  

I had started out planning a light-hearted "safe" painting. Then I read a wonderful guest post at Jules Joyce's website Phenomenal Living.  It was called Bravery & Art, and I realized that to grow I had to stop playing it safe, and be authentic. I had been thinking about dreams, hopes and yearnings of the heart; so I changed my concept to reflect that idea.

"Moonlit Dreams Come True"

Vilnius, Lithuania

9 x 12 acrylics 

on wrapped canvas

If you'd enjoy seeing all the photos of the "making-of" process, I invite you to visit my art blog, Art By Retta. 

My book quote for today: "Don't make light of little victories. Small successes breed large ones. Remember, you have nothing to prove to anyone but yourself." --Joyce Meyer, Love Out Loud

My verse for today: "Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles."

My quote for today: "Art is, in the final analysis, a window on heaven." --Don Hudson

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

PS: As of April 2013, the Comments are turned off. 

Please enjoy just reading, no pressure to respond. 

I hope something Encourages you, or sparks Hope or interest. Or not. 

But either way, I want to continue to document my Journey to Wellness. 

The "numbers" do matter, since they are the result of Consistent good choices.

But it's not ALL about the numbers. 

We are more than that... we are whole people! 

DEC 26th Improving Focus & The Hanging Neck

I loved this POST by Jules, in which she recalled her accomplishments from 2012. It made me realize I had started to focus too much on that fact that I was ending this year heavier than when I started.  

Yes, I needed to learn from it and make course corrections. But after I read her post, I started thinking about making my own "accomplishment list". In fact, I was toying with calling it "What I Learned In 2012". Just remembering some of it was encouraging! And that brought it home to me how much focus I had been putting on my disappointment in the weight loss... or lack thereof. 

My focus was aimed in the wrong direction! I want to focus, instead, on where I am going, and what I WANT, not on what I don't want... on my goals and dreams, and not get stuck in my mistakes. Also, on NOW... to LIVE in the present.

I had to remind myself that what I focus on GROWS! So I'd better take careful aim. I must admit, I'm feeling hugely  encouraged since I've been working on that consciously.

One of the comments on that post from Jules was from June, at The Path to Health.   I visited June's blog, and was set to giggling over the ending of THIS POST  of hers. It tickled my funny bone, because I knew just what she meant! 

She had posted a photo of herself... taken lying down! And made reference to a certain episode of The Golden Girls, and how that was the only position (laying down looking up into the camera) from which she wanted to take the photo, feeling old at the moment. 

Why could I relate?? Because just a few days ago I had to renew my drivers license. Yes... a new photo was required... aargh. It was... not what I had hoped!  (I was going to write ghastly, but that doesn't sound too positive, does it?!) :-D

The guy taking the photo kept saying "just relax". I thought I was relaxed. Later, as I was moaning about how awful it looked, MyGuy said: "He TOLD you to relax, and was trying to help, because you had your lips pursed!"

Well, THIS IS ME! Pursed lips, hanging neck and all! The alternative is to be under a tombstone, so I might as well "be thankful in all circumstances".

Instead of writing out my "accomplishment list for 2012" here today, I'd really rather include something I stumbled upon Christmas eve. I'd read it before, but maybe the timing is just right this time, and it struck a chord in me. 

The verses below were found written on the wall of a children's home in Calcutta, India, that Mother Teresa ran. Some say they seem to be adapted from something originally written by Kent M Keith in 1968. But Mother Teresa changed a few words and made it her own, especially her reference to God at the end.

I love Mother Teresa's version... so here it is in full. I want to keep this in mind going into this bright new year of 2013:

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.

Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. 

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. 

Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.

Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.

Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten.

Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.

Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God.

It was never between you and them anyway.

Enjoy the journey anyway,

Loretta

Post 2022

12/12/12 Bluebirds & The End of the World

Well, it would appear we are still here. It's not the end of the world today, as some interpretations of the ancient Mayan calendar predicted. Whew... that's a relief. ;-)

(Edited to add: it was pointed out to me that most people thinks "it" could happen on Dec 21st... so we still have plenty of time to enjoy the holidays! ha ha ha)

I recently bought myself a little Christmas present (since I assumed Christmas would, indeed, arrive). They are a vintage set of little glass Bluebirds of Happiness.

They are symbolic to me... they remind me of several things. Life is fragile (glass), handle with care.

My favorite color has long been blue. My wedding cake was decorated with blue roses, and my wedding dress had little blue forget-me-nots embroidered on the bodice. I have a small collection of blue glass bottles.

Part of the lyrics to the song "Over the Rainbow" are:

Somewhere over the rainbow

Bluebirds fly.

Birds fly over the rainbow.

Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly

Beyond the rainbow

Why, oh why can't I?

To me, it's about hope. About believing in your dream. About never giving up. These little guys make me smile when I look at them. They remind me that with God, all things are possible. To keep believing, to trust, to never give up.

This has been a tough year for me. Physically, medically, emotionally. I ended up the year heavier than when I started it. I experimented with several different things, and most were... ahem... mistakes. Or maybe I just didn't do them right. And part of the time, I just got plain discouraged and didn't try hard enough. That's just the truth.  

All I know is... to keep going. To keep on keepin' on. 

To learn from my mistakes, and to make changes where necessary. Some of those changes might be hard, but one of the things I've learned is: respect yourself, respect others. And even when you goof up on this journey, learn from it and go on; don't treat yourself with disrespect. And don't let anyone else do it, either. 

Like I said, life is fragile, and so are people. We are all going through "stuff". We might not know what the other guy is going through, but life being what it is... you can bet that sooner or later, we all need that soft place to land, that benefit of the doubt, that bit of kindness.

If anyone is reading this, I wish you the most wonderful Christmas! And if you don't celebrate Christmas, then I bless you with a wonderful winter!

My book quote for today: "The basis for this book is the advice of the apostle Paul as recorded in Philipians 4:8, where he challenges us to seek out and dwell on the positives in our lives. When we look for places where God's character is revealed, we are reminded of his presence in our lives, and we are blessed." --Tommy Newberry, The 4:8 Principle

My verse for today: "Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way."

My quote for today: "Speak only when your words are more beautiful than the silence." Arabic proverb

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 1208

APRIL 6th Our Video Is Here!

Hello Journal & Friends,

I'm excited! It's here... the long anticipated video made especially for us by Coach Dayne, from Coach Your Mind! 

On January 1st of this year, I took a Poll (Here), asking what YOU all would like to see included in his video. Coach Dayne teaches on having a winning mindset, on choosing to be the 1%.. that minority of people who decide that failure, mediocrity and defeatist attitude are not what they want. Who are willing to do the work, to be teachable, and to never ever quit. To believe their goals are possible... thus making it probable that they WILL achieve them. It's for those who decide they are not willing to settle for less any more! 

Does that describe you??

I'm making the choice that it DOES describe me. I'm not going by feelings, I'm choosing it. I. want. it. 

Well, Coach Dayne read your answers to the poll, and we now have the video! Before I give the link to the video (I'm having problems with blogspot letting me embed videos, thus the need for a link) I wanted to let you in on something else Coach Dayne is up to: he's now posting short audio talks on Soundcloud, which also appear on Facebook. If you sign up, Soundcloud will notify you when a new audio is available. 

The audios are short and to the point, and I'm loving them. I already saw one thing I was NOT doing right in visualizing my goals... and that's only after listening to two! Here is the link to Coach Dayne's Soundcloud page.  

Okay, drumroll... here's the long awaited:

 VIDEO ON YOUTUBE link. 

I already took a peek at it, and I am so jazzed! I heard something clearly this time I had been fuzzy on before, and that's exciting to me. 

Need a reason to watch the video? Here's my short summary:

--talks about keys to keeping the kind of powerful motivation that will bust through barriers

--how to super-charge your motivation so it sustains you

--describes the kind of "WHY" needed and what to attach to it in order to make it powerful and solid, so nothing will stop you

--how to separate from the "average" and achieve your goals, to become the 1%

Thank you, Coach Dayne. I appreciate this greatly.

My book quote for today: "What is it like, they ask me, to commit every fiber, every molecule of being, to completing a goal? How do you train yourself to not ever consider the option of quitting under the most stressful situations?" --Richard Machowicz, Unleash the Warrior Within

My verse for today: "I will sing praise to my God as long as I live."

My quote for today: "You control virtually every aspect of this journey." --Jack, at Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit 

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 963

APRIL 2nd I'm Still Alive!

Hi Journal & Friends,

Sunday night I had a dream.

I died.

It wasn't scary or morbid or anything like that. But man, it was so real! It came unexpected, and swift. There was a LOT to the dream, and I remember exactly what I said when I realized I was "there" and not "here" any longer: "But I'm not finished".

Like I said, there was a whole lot more. But the take away messages for ME was this:

None of us know when our time is done here. So live to our fullest NOW.

There is Love there. But also make sure you live in Love here, and NOW.

I feel in my heart I am not finished here yet, so I want to not waste any time NOW.

Master the Now!

Just yesterday (Sunday) I watched a video on Coach Dayne's blog, Coach Your Mind.  The line I wrote down from the video to remember was: Master the now!  I can see how that also worked itself into my dream.

I was going to write a whiny post about how I gained 3 lbs last month, and how I'm going to work harder, yadda yadda yadda. Well, it kinda pales in significance to dying!! Yes, I AM getting my rear in gear. And getting on with this. But not "to lose weight". That will be a great side benefit.

I want to get on with the program and lose the weight so I CAN live now, so I can finish my business here. So I can give that love NOW, in my own way.

Wow, what a dream!! 

I woke up early, feeling excited and bursting with energy and renewed motivation! Now... to add the ACTION to that motivation.

My book quote for today: "You can always do more than you think, you can always go a lot farther than you think." --Richard Machowicz, Unleash The Warrior Within

My verse for today: "But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more."

My quote for today: "Success isn't a destination, it's a belief. Belief isn't taught, it's decided. When will you decide?" --Dayne Gingrich

Enjoy the Journey as long as it lasts,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 959

FEB 14th Happy VD & Other Stuff

Hi Journal & Friends,

Okay, don't holler at me for the title... I know what VD stands for in medical circles! But I saw Anne use that at Carb Tripper and it cracked me up, so I shamelessly stole it! LOL! Come to think of it, she often cracks me up. :-D 

On to the Other Stuff...

I recently stumbled upon a website created by Todd Henry called the Accidental Creative, and found it fascinating. Don't have a clue how I got there, but am glad I did. 

They have free podcasts and one was an interview he did with author Michael Bungay Stanier, who wrote Do More Great Work (Here). 

Now, here's what caught my curiosity. Before I listened to the interview, I had clicked to his website to see if I was interested. There, the description of the book was TOTALLY BORING!! Ugh... yet the podcast had promised oh-so-great things.

Daredevil that I am (yeah, right) I listened anyway. Surprise! I found the interview extremely fascinating. The author was... different. And interesting, in an odd sort of way. I liked him! (Here is the podcast interview) 

He got on to the topic of "failure", and how we perceive it. And he went on to say he regularly meditates, and that "I regularly fail to meditate with any capacity whatsoever..." He explained that he found it difficult to focus, and yet he didn't see this as a negative. He just accepted that he was learning, refocused his breathing and went on. 

I loved his relaxed attitude. He was not threatened by a "perceived" failure. He talked about having the willingness to come back to whatever it is we are trying to learn, and to just go on. To be willing to be resilient. 

This goes along with what I've been thinking lately... about not being afraid of failure. To not hold back, but to leap out there, to dare, to live and be bold.

To try things, and see what does and does not work. To experiment and play and explore.

Just last night I watched a short youtube video interview with Maurice Sendak, the author/illustrator of Where The Wild Things Are. I didn't know he was so... crusty! And opinionated, thoughtful, outspoken, feisty, and bold. 

And he said something that most creative people can identify with... in fact, anyone who is standing on a cliff edge, wondering if they dare take that leap of faith and try something new. It doesn't matter if it's in a creative area, or a new plan to health and fitness... I think the principle holds true:

"Artists have to take a dive, and either you hit your head on a rock and you split your skull and you die... OR... that blow to the head is so inspiring that you come up and do the best work that you ever did. BUT... you have to take the dive, and you do not know what the results will be."

There's that message again... boldness. Living fearlessy and boldly. Take the dive, take the risk.

Right now I'm involved with some art projects I've never done before, and sometimes when I "think" too much, I start to say "but I'm in over my head". So... I don't think about that. :-D 

Instead I'm gonna remember what Maurice Sendak said, and take that leap of faith!

From Dr Phil's book: "Be willing to get out of your comfort zone and require more of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and behaviorally."

My verse for today: "Be exalted, O Lord, in your strength; we will sing and praise your might."

My quote for today: "Let the wild rumpus start!" --Maurice Sendak, Where The Wild Things Are

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 911

JAN 24th Toon Tuesday, A Freebie & Playing With Fire

Hi there Journal & Friends,

With the shiny new year of 2012, I am shifting some of my emphasis to what I want: my art, and to live my life to the fullest, becoming who I was meant to be, living with passion and purpose. 

That's why I'm working, afterall, to lose weight and regain health. That's my WHY. I want to focus on that, on what I WANT, not focus on what I do NOT want. To look forward, not backward. 

I was reminded recently that our brain can't tell the difference between a negative or a positive. For instance, think of a pink elephant.

Now... do NOT think of the pink elephant. I don't know about you, but every time I close my eyes and say "do NOT think of a pink elephant"... I DO! This silly example helps to remind me not to focus on "I don't want to be fat"...but rather... "I want to be healthy, strong and lighter". 

So... on to focus on what I DO want. :-D

For my birthday, my sister Karen sent me a birthday card with this quote: 

"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit." --Albert Schweitzer

Today for Toon Tuesday, I want to offer a VLOG showing--in speed drawing mode--my doodle of Word Bubble #1. It will be blank in the middle, and I offer the finished doodle below as a free download to anyone who would like to play along. You get to pick your own inspiring word to add to the center. 

By the way, I kinda sorta goofed, and didn't leave a very large word bubble in the middle. Sorry 'bout dat. Next time I'll make the blank space bigger. :-}

Here's the finished blank for you to download. Be sure to click and enlarge, so you download the large file, not the thumbnail.

 I'm going to dink around this coming week and color mine. You are welcome to do whatever you want to yours... color it, change it, glitter it, alter it, collage it, whatever. And next Tuesday it would so fun if you came back and gave a link to your blog to share your results, if you're comfortable doing so. 

Only one rule: Have fun! Remember when we were kids and not worried about "being good"? So give yourself permission to just goof around and play, okay?  :-D

Remember the above quote from my sister Karen? The inspiring word I added to my word bubble is FIRE!

This is a first for me, drawing with a camera watching. In INK! No pencil, no eraser. No plan, other than to leave a word bubble in the middle. New year... new adventures!

Speed Doodling - Word Bubble #1 by Retta

(For an easier to see larger version, just

go to my YouTube Page HERE)

For you busybees who don't have 6 min to watch (or maybe you're at work) that's okay, just swipe a copy of the doodle and play along anyway. :-)

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 890