Tuesday, August 31, 2010

DAY 383 Times, They Are A-Changin

Hi Journal & Friends,

It's time. Time to shift emphasis, to progress. To get out of the planning/anticipating/dreaming phase, and get on to the DOING phase.

All of you who post about there being all the time in the world, that this is not a race, and all that... well, that's great for you who are younger. 

For me? I am VERY aware of the clock. Of the fact that I have a finite number of days left. And I want them to be glorious!

I want them to be spectacular! I don't want to have one more regret... one more thing that I "wished" I had tried, but procrastinated, or waited, or was too fearful to do.

So it's time. Time for me to face down my resistance to change and declare that not only am I "saying" I am a Warrior, but I am DOING a Warrior... if you know what I mean, LOL!

I got too comfortable in my routines. I felt safe. Predictable. I had my little blog format... I knew that on Sunday I would post a favorite photo... some Fridays I could post a Friday Favorite... occasionally on Tuesday I would put up a Toon Tuesday. I knew how to do a google search for nice little photos for my nice little posts.

I was in my comfort zone. I had my safe little world, thank you very much. And I didn't want to rock the boat!!

Well... whether I liked it or not, my little boat got rocked! 

As I have admitted, I was struggling last week in all areas. Oh, no major binge blow-outs, like I would have done in the past. But for where I am NOW, eating maintenance portions of on-program food is NOT acceptable. And I slacked off on exercise, only meeting half of my goal for each day.
So here I am, feeling bad enough about all that, and trying to get honest enough with myself to get to the bottom of it... and of course I go and start yet another "self-help" book. I didn't expect much... it was just one I had heard about for years and never read, and I was between fiction stories, so why not...

Well! I'll go into which one it was in another post... that's not the point here. But it surprised me with it's content, and shook up my point of view, and showed where I was wrong in some of my thinking... harrumph!!! 

It rocked my already rocking boat, to the point that I started to accept the fact that I needed to "embrace the change", as one dear blog friend told me to do.

And then.... it happened. That "thing" that happens to me every so often, if I am open and teachable, and willing to learn and... here's that word again... change.

From no less than EIGHT different sources, I got the same message. EIGHT! Even a stubborn hard head like ME can get that message.

I was stuck in my routine... my commitment... my plan... to change it felt like failure... it felt wrong. 

I said recently that I needed to learn Flexibility. Well, here's my opportunity.

Ms PJ Geek told me recently in a comment: "Hang in there... Dr Phil's comment 'Stay real and stay flexible', seems perfect for you right now. When you are ready to change the time management stuff, it will change."

I am ready. I am ready to face it, to stop resisting change, to embrace change.

Mary from Wistful Nebulae has lost her weight, reached her goal, and is LIVING her passion now. She told me:

"Change is scary and uncomfortable. Know that. There must be one thing on that list bigger than the discomfort. Something that you think, 'wow'. That's what you start with...

Weight loss teaches us what happens if we give up and what happens if we don't. We all have to pay our dues. It's a beautiful thing. A rite of passage.

Have the guts to do what thousands of others think about but don't do. Sure, I get some mud slung at me, but so what. I'm doing it and they're not. Who really wins? I do. Because I have the guts to do. It's the definition of courage - it scares the piss out of me but I do it anyway. Why? It's who I am. I deserve to be who I am. When I let myself be what I should have always been, I'm happy.

Are you doing something for accolades or because you love it? If it's for love, it doesn't matter what anyone else on the planet thinks. It really doesn't. Do it for love, and others will respond to your passion. Realize there is a learning curve. Realize that being in the game is exhilarating - filled with highs and lows. But being in the game is where I once dreamed to be and where thousands of others dream to be. It hurts sometimes, but I'm living my life. I'm alive and it feels fantastic...

Your passions will light you up from the inside. It will spill over into everything you do. When you're lit up, everyone around you gets a better version of you.

So, find a way to do, Loretta."

I've been bugging Mary to do a guest post... well, I guess she just did! Wasn't that inspiring?!! She is a writer, and you can read some of her short stories HERE.  My favorite is "Plantgirl".

So, I am going to do what Mary said... I am going to DO. And to DO that, I need more free time. And to get more free time, I will be blogging less.

I won't be offended at all if anyone stops reading... I understand. But I don't want to just write about living, I want to LIVE IT. Therefore, starting tomorrow in the fresh, shiny new month of September, my tentative new plan is to blog 4 days per week. And the other days will be put towards my art. 

I hope my bloggy friends will stick with me... I have come to care for you all... you are REAL to me! This new schedule should also give me more time to visit all my favorite bloggy friends. I don't want to be a "taker", but also a "giver". You all have been so wonderfully supportive, and you in return deserve my support!

September... a shiny new month of fresh starts and grand experiments!

Today's Peek at the Past (Holy cannoli! This couldn't be more perfect for today! In fact, it was so perfect, I almost cried.)

From Day 22, August 31, 2009:
I may be late getting to the party, but I accept the invitation. And I am grateful to be invited, and given a chance to enjoy it with the music turned up, singing and dancing and celebrating the possibilities all the way out! I have plans...big plans...dreams...hopes...visions...daring and exciting. What have I got to lose to at least try???

To those who have been given this chance at a younger age, I would say: GRAB IT!! Give it your absolute ALL. Make this YOUR time, and let nothing dash your dreams. We don't control most of what happens TO us in life, but we have ABSOLUTE control over how we respond, which will make all the difference in the world in our thinking and our choices and how we interact with others...and ultimately, our future. Be bold!! Don't let the years slip away...Muster up all the courage inside of you, ignite the fires of enthusiasm, and go for it now!!!

(For complete post "Question One & Mud or Stars" click HERE)

From Dr Phil's book: "Get off your duff and get moving."

My verse for today:  "How priceless is your unfailing love!"

My quote for today: "Character consists of what you do on the third and fourth tries." --John Albert Michener

Enjoy the Journey,


Monday, August 30, 2010

DAY 382 Time For A Recharge

Hello there Journal & Friends,

Yesterday I tried to do some quiet, contemplative thinking. Uh huh.

I ended up crying. Huh?? What's this all about?? I answered myself before I had time to "logic" it out: I don't like my life.  

Again, huh??

Boy, talk about a pity party. I realized it was not ALL of my life I didn't like... but those parts that were still out of balance... still needing work. I feel embarrassed and frustrated that I am STILL working on the same ol' problems, mostly tied up with Time Management. Sigh.

I decided to just take a break and do something fun. Yeah, I escaped. I watched a movie I had heard a teensy about: Julie & Julia.

I LOVED IT! I didn't know it started as a gal and her blog. How fun! She followed her passion for cooking, and it took her on an extraordinary adventure!

I was so enthralled... I watched... I howled with laughter at her first lobster-murdering  experience... I was intrigued at the life of Julia Childs, and fell in love with her exhuberance for life. What a fun movie!

It recharged me, and filled me with a sense of adventure... wondering what my own future might hold if... if I keep going, and don't lose my enthusiasm.

Sometimes my batteries seem to wear down... lose their charge.

Yesterday gave my batteries a fresh charge. I really needed it... I've been having a real tough week.

As for my update for The Just 1 Thing Challenge...

Basically, the whole week was a bust. I didn't meet my goals all week. I'm just not going to dwell on it... I need to move on. I know I messed up with sleep, which had a domino effect on everything else. 

It's a fresh week, and I need to re-focus and continue on.

Onward and downward, as Deb says!

Today's Peek at the Past (Ha ha ha... it was "A Day of Rest". How fitting.)

From Day 21, August 30, 2009:
For now, I am planning not to write much on Sunday.

From Dr Phil's book: "Stay real and stay flexible."
My verse for today: "I will be glad and rejoice in your love."

My quote for today: "Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus." --Alexander Graham Bell

Enjoy the Journey,


Sunday, August 29, 2010

DAY 381 Day of Rest & Favorite Photo

Hi Journal & Friends,

I've been doing some thinking today, and feel like I just need to shut up for awhile...at least for today. ;-)

This photo Jim took fits my mood... quiet and contemplative.

Today's Peek at the Past (Ha! Perfect for me today, just perfect.)

From Day 20, Aug 29, 2009:

There is a time to re-visit the past...RE-VISIT, not live there. Not to wallow in it, stuck and feeding on the negativity. But rather, to be honest about it, forgive mistakes and poor choices, learn from it, and move on to an ACTION-ORIENTED SOLUTION.

(For complete post "Five Questions & Why" click HERE

Enjoy the Journey,


Saturday, August 28, 2010

DAY 380 Action, Not Talk

Good Afternoon, Journal & Friends,

I'll keep it Short & Sweet today.

"The best bridge between despair and hope 
is a good night's sleep." 
--E. Joseph Cossman

All I really have to say is... I feel SO MUCH BETTER. I slept like a log last night, and didn't set the alarm. I didn't need to get up and make two meals for MyGuy to take to work today, so I figured I'd just allow myself to get "all slept up". 

Today the idea of exercise is not so daunting.
Today cleaning the house seems like a good idea.
Today I feel like making something healthy and yummy to eat.
Today I feel like making an EFFORT!


(Maxfield Parrish "Mountain Ecstasy")

Today's Peek at the Past (Okay, okay... I get the message! Time to stop talking about my lack of regular sleep, and start DOING something about it.)

From Day 19, AUGUST 28, 2009:
He says you don't get rid of bad habits, you replace them with healthy ones. You take action. And for me, it took taking those actions over and over and over, and I will admit that some of those old habits STILL give me problems (umm, like...not getting regular sleep!).

It takes CONSISTENT action...not just action. How long? For as long as it takes to stick. Shakespeare said: "Assume a virtue if you have it not."

Could it be that if we don't consistently put the new habits into action, again and again and again--as long as it takes, until we have "grafted" it into our thinking and actions and it really has taken root--well, that might be why it seems to evaporate so easily, and we find we even forgot all about it for awhile??? 

(For complete post "New Habits: Teflon or Velcro?" click HERE

From Dr Phil's book: "If you continue to eat the way you've always eaten, you will continue to stay the way you've always been."

My verse for today: "I desire to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart."

My quote for today: "The amount of sleep required by the average person is five more minutes." --Wilson Mizener

Enjoy the Journey,


Friday, August 27, 2010

DAY 379 ZZzzzzzzz.......

Hello Journal & Friends,

"If it was a snake, it would've bit ya!"  

That was the saying in my family when I was a kid... used when something was so obvious, but we didn't see it. It could have been an object we were hunting for, or an idea.

I finally figured out why I have been struggling so much this week, in every area... and it was sooo obvious! It's almost embarrassing to admit... it was SO OBVIOUS, yet for some reason I just didn't see it...

I've been short on sleep all week. Duh.

And maybe that's why I didn't see it... my brain wasn't firing on all cylinders. The problem is now so obvious... and so is the solution. 

Today's Peek at the Past (No way! It can't be... sheesh, haven't I learned a thing in a whole year??! This is soooo humbling... tempted to skip this one. But in the interest of self-honesty, I'll just let it all hang out.)

From Day 18, August 27, 2009:
How strong is my desire to be successful on this mission?
Am I willing to do whatever it takes? Whatever??
Am I being honest with myself?
Is there anything in my plan that needs fine-tuning?
Are there aspects of my life that I am avoiding addressing, or stalling on changing?

I have to admit, I answered yes to those last two. It has to do with time management, and getting enough sleep consistently. This is not a new issue for me, and I even have a "plan". But I have not made it a priority, and allowed excuses to pre-empt "the plan".

This was not what I had intended on writing today. But I am tired. I am on my second cup of coffee...and I NEVER have more than one...usually. Spellcheck can't even keep up with me today...obviously I need to apply the No Excuses Mentality to THIS problem.

(For complete post "Travel Friends  & Sleep... or Lack Thereof" click HERE

From Dr Phil's book: "Impulse moments are critical for you to manage... you need a real strategy worked out in advance."

My verse for today: "Laziness brings on deep sleep, and the shiftless man goes hungry."

My quote for today: "Without enough sleep, we all become tall two-year-olds." JoJo Jensen

Enjoy the Journey,


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