Day 64 of ReStart, Monday Oct 12, 09
Today is a New day! I am ready to continue this journey, refreshed and feeling spunky!
Monday is my regular weigh-in day: 369 lbs...so I re-lost that one pound gain from last week. Considering my 4 days of eating too much, I'll take it! As my Dad used to say...it's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick! (good grief, where did these old sayings come from?!?!)
And in keeping with pokes in the eye...after WEEKS of searching, I finally found...drumroll....a BEFORE picture of me at nearly my highest weight, which was 460. This photo was around 450ish.
And I was not mugging for the camera...I really was annoyed that my husband was pointing that THING at me!! That is why it has been so hard to find a before pic...I avoided cameras like the plague. Who, at 460 pounds, wants to see themselves in a photograph??! It is just a painful reminder... humiliating... embarrassing ...perpetuating the self-loathing, etc etc etc.
For comparison, I have include photos since then...I hope there is a noticable difference... it is hard for me to see it!
But NOW, I can post this thing, KNOWING I will never be at that painful place again.
It has been a long and winding road for me...I will never win the "quickest weight loss award"... maybe the Yo-Yo Queen Award. BUT, my message for anyone struggling is...NEVER NEVER NEVER QUIT...Don't you dare quit!! Some of us have a lot to learn...a lot of issues...a lot to surrender...a lot of healing, and most of all, a lot of excuses!!
Today, however, I have hope. I have determination. I am on a journey to get my life back, and get out of my way, obstacles, or I'll run ya down!!
From Dr Phil's book: "Successful people do what unsuccessful people won't...you don't have to like them; you just have to do them."
My verse for today: "The end of a matter is better than it's beginning..."
My quote for today: "When faced with a mountain, I will not quit! I will keep striving until I climb over, find a pass through, tunnel underneath or simply stay and turn the mountain into a gold mine, with God's help."--Robert Half
Enjoy the Journey,