Monday, February 21, 2011

FEB 21 I'm A... Black Belt?!

Good Afternoon Journal & Friends,

A couple of days ago it dawned on me that I'm a master... an expert... a black belt ninja! Only I wasn't too excited about what KIND of an expert I am... 

I am an expert at Pain Avoidance. 

As I got out of bed, carefully moving to avoid making anything worse... I realized I had been doing that all my life. Both physical AND emotional pain.

The physical pain avoidance is obvious. But then there's the emotional pain. Yep, that where the Caloric Opiates come in, right? The food... the distraction... the temporary feel-good chemicals from the sugar high. Yes, I've known about this for a long, long time. But somehow, it seemed there was something new to learn here...

These thoughts occurred to me in a flash, right as I was practicing my morning Attitude of Gratitude. I was thanking God for all the times He has brought me information, ideas, corrections, new instructions, etc. And was thinking of how many times I stiffened and resisted, yet He never gave up on me. And I was feeling thankful.

And that's when this new idea hit me. I already KNEW that pain is not a good motivator. It's not good to state our goals like: I don't want to be fat and old and weak and in pain.

No... I find it much more motivating to word it in the postitive, like so: I WANT to be healthy and strong and mobile!

So, I have to ask myself: Why do I wait til I simply can't STAND the pain of something, either physically or emotionally, to get off my duff and DO something about it?

And the answer came: Some things I don't DO, in order to avoid pain. And again, other things I DO do, in order to avoid pain. 

It's all the same reason: to avoid pain. Whether physical or emotional.

Like... I finally started my latest Buns of Steel campaign to avoid the pain in my lower back and fractured tailbone. Yet... I was still resisting being consistent on OTHER exericse, because it was painful to get started. Pain avoidance.

And still, after all the times I've posted "Face Your Stuff, Don't Stuff Your Face", I tend to put off facing my issues. Pain avoidance, again.

And I even recently avoided watching a short video posted by a blogger that I highly respect. Why?? Because of the very TITLE of the post??!! 

Can ya see why someone like ME, a ninja Master at pain avoidance, wouldn't want to watch that??!! Only... at the time I didn't realize WHY I didn't want to watch. Oh, I told myself "I'm too busy, I'll come back later." Uh-huh... didn't come back. In fact, right this instant, I still haven't watched it. Okay... take break... off to watch...

I'm back. And I have to say... Coach Dayne is a Secret Weapon. His blog has touched my life, and made a difference in my "mental game". You don't have to be a real athlete to glean terrific insights and strategies from him. If you haven't read his blog Coach Your Mind,  I highly recommend it, including the archives which are loaded with hidden treasure... really!!

And his video confirmed I am on the right track, even though my first instinct was to resist.

All of my pain avoidance shows I was doing the very thing I have recently been studying: being reactive, instead of proactive. Reacting to the pain, by either DOing or NOT doing a thing... instead of taking charge and making my decisions based on what I WANT, instead of based on trying to avoid something. 

Going TO something, not running FROM something.

That's what I really want to learn... to be free from that old Pain Avoidance mentality, and instead choose to take action from a positive motivation.

So, like Coach Dayne says on the video, to overcome our barriers... to reach our goals and achieve our victories: Invite the fight!

PS: Thank you to all who asked... my Vampire Eye is getting better. :-)

From Dr Phil's book: "Change will happen because you make it happen."

My verse for today: "I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears."

My quote for today: "I don't care how old I live; I just want to be LIVING while I am living! --Jack LaLanne

Enjoy the Journey,


DAY 556


mamajuliana said...

I 'borrowed' your Stuff picture-I hope you don't mind.

I can sympathize with you about pain. I used to do anything to avoid it-and food played a big part in that.

That is how I handled abuse...and all the time I was creating another

Oh how it takes us so long to learn!

But the great part is WE ARE LEARNING!

Love to you! Glad to see the red eye is getting better!

Anonymous said...

Well. Despite the vampire eye, you have such a good face. :)

The Pain avoidance? I'm sure I'd qualify for expert status, too.

Logn ago, so long that I can't exactly remember the context or the specific wording of the question or even who asked--but the question, basically was wanting to know what was the one thing I didn't want to give up. I prayed about the answer.

The answer? My COMFORT. Not physical comfort like nice things or a nice car--I couldn't care less about that--but my emotional comfort. My "I need time alone" comfort. I "like peace and hate chaos" comfort. I "don't want to be embarrassed" comfort.

Comfort. Same as pain avoidance, isn't it?

That's why we're fat, girlfriend, that's why. Drug seeking to medicate pain--sometimes in advance--and achieve comfort.


Rettakat said...

MAMAJULIANA: I don't mind at all. And if you click on it, it'll open up pretty huge, and you can download a larger pic. I found all those funny images online, and just put them together. Enjoy!

DEB: Isn't it funny... how many times have I (and most of us) talked about stepping outside our "comfort zone"?? Now I see why I resisted that so much!

Anne H said...

OMG! Loretta!
That's a mess of an eye!
Bless your sweet heart!

Anonymous said...

Loretta...I am a big fan of your revelations. I love it when you get down to it and really dig around to find out what is inside of you. Bravo brave lady!

Glad the vampire eye is improving.

'Yellow Rose' Jasmine said...

Oh yes, so telling. Never once, not even once, has it been that doing something tough- maybe even painful did not equal something so much bigger and better. Not even when I couldn't see the better ending coming or imagine it at all.
I just wish I would always remember that when I am in the midst of something rough. What a nice insight you have gotten. Onward and upward!

Hanlie said...

Yeah, I have that problem too! My husband is always telling me to toughen up, because he ran 100km with bleeding blisters...

The emotional pain is the killer one though, but I've found lately that the idea of the pain is scarier than the pain itself.

We'll get there!

Dayne Gingrich said...

Thank you SOOO MUCH for you incredible words, Loretta. I'm totally honored and humbled that you would say such things about me and my blog!!

I don't pretend to know it all, or be anything special... only one more tool in the journey of finding a "new way." A MORE CONFIDENT WAY!!

Thank you again. I'm touched.

PeacefulBird said...

Again and again your posts challenge and inspire me to look more carefully with what, why and how I do or don't do stuff. I'm pretty darn sure that I'm your twin black-belt Ninja, champion pain avoider. Learning to feel my feelings, more than anything else, for me involves allowing pain to open the door. Good for you! Good for us!

MizFit said...

checking on you Loretta.

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