Friday, November 4, 2011

NOV 4th A Gift In My Life

Hello Journal & Friends,

Life has a way of reminding us about Priorities. Here's what the recently deceased Steve Jobs had to say:

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma--which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

Why am I on this train of thought?? Because once again, I've lost a Friend to death. It's taken a couple of days before I could even talk about it, but I want to honor her life... so let me tell you about my friend Millie.

We met almost 7 years ago on the Dr Phil weight loss message boards.  A handful of us created a private Yahoo group where we could bare our souls, and Millie was a faithful member of that group. She died this last Monday. Millie, who was 44, had struggled with weight all her life, and had lost around 150 pounds with about 90 to go when she died. Her heart had a habit of racing out of control occasionally, and the extra weight made it worse. She was highly motivated...yet still struggled. 

Millie had 9 children (!), all the way from a married son and her first grandson, to her own 2 year old baby boy. She desparately wanted that little guy to never know a "fat mommy". She fought the old all-or-nothing thinking, swinging from rigid perfectionism during which she'd do fabulously... to getting frustrated and stopping altogether for a few days or weeks. But overall... she never gave up. She'd get back up, dust off, and keep going.

God was Millie's foundation, her source of strength. We had lot's of "talks" about that, and agreed that God didn't make us robots. We have the freedom to choose, and Millie wanted to make healthy choices... for herself and as an example to her children. She cared deeply about not passing on unhealthy habits to her kids. 

Oh, how Millie loved being a Mommy. In her last email to me about a week ago, she was so tickled that her sweet Hubby was taking over the homeschooling duties, and for the first time in 16 years, she would get to focus on being a wife, homemaker and Mom.

Folks... this has been such a punch in the gut to me. Thinking of all those children without their Mom. A grieving husband. The first grandson she was so excited about, who will never know Grandma. A 2 year old babe who can't understand where Mommy is...

Why, oh why, have I goofed around and taken so long at this weight loss thing?? We are not promised tomorrow. Yet sometimes I "forget" what's really important, and give in to the moment. I forget that Time is finite here on earth, and I fritter it away. I make less than healthy nutritional choices, thinking there's always tomorrow.

My life is richer for having known Millie. No, I never met her in person. But I've met her heart, and received encouragement and kindness from her over and over. And now she once again is teaching me to LIVE NOW. To keep my priorities straight. To go for my dreams NOW. 

Oh Millie, I'm going to miss you... you were such a gift in my life.


DAY 810


Princess Dieter said...

This is so sad. It's obvious she was a tremendously lovely person and now her children, spouse, family and friends are bereft.

Yes, let's take this lesson. Let's stop coddling ourselves and get HEALTHY, because we are damaging the Holy Temple God gave us to house our souls when we eat in unhealthful ways. We only have now. Now is it. make good choices.

Let's not steal our lives from our loved ones.

Take care and be well, L.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Loretta... That is heartbreaking. My deepest condolences to you on the loss of your friend, and to her beloved family.

We only have today; this hour... minute... moment. We can only plan to do our best right now, because that's what we have.

Blessings to all of you.

Anonymous said...

This is a lovely post honoring your friend, her life...and yours.

I'm so glad that Jesus puts His arms around us and holds tight when our hearts ache.

I'm so glad that you know how to lean into Him, too. Now is surely the time.

Drink in the love and courage and strength that He has for you. It's not too late.


Suzanne said...

I'm so sorry. Thank you for sharing Millie with us. I never knew her, I don't really know you, and yet I feel so touched. I ache inside for everyone who knew and loved her and did not expect to say goodbye so soon.

Thank you for the wake up call. You are so right. And I bet that Millie would want you, us, to get the message you have shared today. Stop wasting time, and take care of your health! And it reminds me of what you said about letting life be the engine. We do have to focus on health and weight, but we also need to live. Live every day to the fullest and stop waiting for some magical moment when everything will suddenly be better. Here's to letting life be the engine.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for your loss Loretta and I feel for her family...I am sure she will be sorely missed.

Thanks for the take charge of our health reminder. Time here is definitely not finite.

Hugs to you Loretta.

debby said...

Oh Loretta, I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you shared Millie with us.

Christine said...

I'm so sorry Loretta, It can be a hit to the gut and I will pray for her family. That is beyond sad. I hope they can get some help....that poor man is going to need it.

D.Reeve said...

I'm sorry for your loss. Thank you for the sobering reminder that life is precious, but never promised. I'm going to hug my husband a little tighter tonight.

Mom to the Fourth Power said...

What a wonderful tribute to your friend. She certainly will be missed...
Prayers going out for all those mourning her loss and especially those dear children of hers!


Ginny said...

I just came to your blog for the first time today, Loretta, and am so sorry for your loss. We just never know how long we will have special people in our lives. They are there for a reason. May the Lord bless you in all your memories of your sweet friend.


M Pax said...

My deepest sympathies, Loretta. I will keep Millie, her family and you in my prayers.

I lost my BIL last year at 43. That message hit home for me then, and it's a loss I still grieve. There's no sense to any of it.

Hugs to you, my friend. Hugs to her family and dear children.

Rettakat said...

Thank you everyone, I truly appreciate the kind comments. :-)

E. Jane said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend, Millie. My condolences to her family too. Life can be shorter than we think. Bless you Loretta, because you knew the value of a true friend. That in itself is a special gift.

carla said...

Im late as life has conspired against me lately---but here none the less.

Hugs, my Friend.


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