Friday, April 1, 2011

APRIL 1st Foolish Thinking & Continuing On

Hi there Journal & Friends,

People are interesting...

I remember once having a friend from church that I looked up to. She was older than I was, had quite the high IQ, and we had a weight problem in common. One day we were talking about some topic--I don't remember which--and we disagreed.

Then she said something that I never forgot...
 When I asked her WHY she insisted she was right, she said: "It MUST be true... because I believe it."

Alrighty then! But really, isn't that how we are? We get stuck in our own opinion, and just keep building our body of evidence. I'm including myself here.

So... lately I've been challenged to rethink a position, to acknowlege there might, just might be a different way to look at it!

Okay, here was my big opinion:

If you want to lose weight and KEEP it off, you can't have a Diet Mentality. And my definition of a Diet Mentality was: a diet is something you go ON, then later you go OFF of it. And you go back to your old ways, and regain your lost weight, along with some of it's buddies.

I believed that because I DID that too many times in my life to count! It was disheartening... demoralizing... devastating.

Now, if you're just skimming this post in a rush, you are going to go away thinking that's my main point, to not have a Diet Mentality. Nope, it's not.

My main point is this: I was wrong. I was foolishly narrow minded. There IS a Diet Mentality, don't get me wrong. I lived it, I proved that. 

But I'm beginning to see there is a Parallel Truth there. You know... when a different point of view is ALSO true. Doesn't make one NOT true... it just means there is more than one way to reach the goal... more than one approach that can work.

What am I babbling about?? 

When I started on this final weight loss effort, I told myself that I WILL NEVER GO ON ANOTHER DIET AGAIN IN MY LIFE. That's IT. I've HAD it. If it's not something I can do for life, then it's a "diet", and I just won't do it.

Well, I stubbornly, pridefully, clung to that belief, and foolishly thought it should apply to EVERYONE. I supported anyone's chosen path publically, but inside I would be worried for them... about what would happen to them when they ended their "diet" and went back to real food. I assumed the same thing would happen to them, that happened to ME. 

But my premise had a flaw. I was assuming that anyone who was losing weight on a "diet" had that same Diet Mentality that I used to have. Ooops.

I've finally had my eyes opened, I think. I've been reading many different blogs, and can see a few who are different. Oh sure, there are some who are still hunting for that "easier, softer way" as they say in OA and AA. Who still hope for a magic quick fix, and all that.

But I was watching carefully as people like Anne at Carb Tripper experimented with Liquid Protein drinks. And others, like Margene and her Hub,  who have successfully lost about 250 lbs together, using Medifast. And she is at GOAL NOW!! Margene has a whole terrific website, with photos showing healthy ways to put together nutritious Lean n Green meals. She is obviously planning on eating healthy for life! (Really, if you want ideas for simple healthy meals, check it out here).

But the icing on the cake (sorry for that!) was when I read an old post by Lyn at Escape from Obesity. It was titled: For the Rest of Your Life: Diet, or Lifestyle?

What a zinger! It was the final nail in the coffin of my know-it-all opinion on the subject!! 

No, I haven't rushed out to buy Medifast (I don't do soy, it messes with my thyroid function). But I'm rethinking my position. What Lyn, Anne and Margene said made a lot of sense. Sometimes we need a tool, a method, to shake things up, and get going. So... I've just been trying to be more open minded  about this topic, and been a-thinking...

This was a hard month for me, for sure. My Dad died on March 7th. I didn't do bingeing like in days of old. But I didn't try very hard, either. I was "comfortable" with portions. Which for me means too much too often. Hence this mornings weigh-in: 344. Up 7 pounds from last month. Siiighhhh. Bloggers who enjoy slicing and dicing those who struggle will have fun with that one. *shrug*

But... I am trying. This past Monday morning I was 347. That was so discouraging, it helped me face reality. We will always have "life" to deal with. I've let it become an excuse, and that needs to stop.

So... onward with the Great Spring SlimDown to Summer. I will never quit. I may have to adjust... rethink... or try a better approach, but I'll never quit. 

From Dr Phil's book: "Change your thinking to change your weight."

My verse for today: "I will praise your name, O Lord, for it is good. For He has delivered me from all my troubles."

My quote for today: "Looking back you realize that a very special person passed briefly through your life--and it was you. It is not too late to find that person again." --R. Brault

Enjoy the Journey,


DAY 595


M Pax said...

That's why I've never worried about you, Retta. You don't give up. You'll figure it out and find your way.

It's been over 3 years now and I've kept the weight off and it's not a struggle for me. I'm saying that so you can see it's possible. I didn't know it was until I did it and keep it up.

Deb Willbefree said...

You know, I've been thinking along the same lines for awhile now. I won't go into detail since this is a comment and not a post, but my Spring slimDown to Summer was one of the results of what you discussed here. I think there is a time to GET THE WEIGHT OFF and a time to let it slip away gently. Of course, at the moment, I'm not doing either. :(

Like you, I'm not quitting, tho. I'm not gaining back everything I've lost despite this last 6 months. And I don't want to be a hamster, either! :D


MargieAnne said...

My answer is whatever works for you.

The main thing is to be healthy. Balanced nutrition comes in many forms.

I get quite 'upset' when people try to avoid the word Diet. Our diet is how and what we eat, whether it's full time KFC or medifast or organic etc.

I'm maintaining almost perfectly! Huhhh!!!

I need to do something fast before I lose the plot entirely.

What are you doing about about your plan? I need to Blog some more.

Smiles and hugs and Blessings.

Chubby McGee said...

I love this post! I hold it true in my own mentality. I had to find something that worked for me and I'm planning on making it work FOR-ever. Not just 'til goal. Not just 'til I turn 35. Not just 'til I can fit into a bikini. I had to find a plan that worked for me that I can follow when I'm 50, 60, 70 and on. It'll still be trial and error (as my metabolism/hormones change), but I'm on board for LIFE.

I love your post today! I love YOU!

Christina said...

Loretta, I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. Your family will be in my thoughts.

I always love reading your realizations! :)

Karen Elizabeth Brown said...

When I finished reading your post and saw "The End" written at the bottom, I stopped and took a double take. The End? No! The Beginning! To Be Continued! but not The End!
You post sparks a positive chord of commitment. And for all of us who struggle, I say let it continue. May it be diet or not to die, just don't give up! Someone close to me once said: If you stop struggling to make life better, then you've laid down to die. There is no static middle ground in life... you're either coming or going.
Thanks for a great post!

Ms. PJ Geek said...

My thought is it is a have to be open to change. For me it's a 'time of 'diet' within a lifestyle change'. When we are in it for the long haul changing things up works but it's hard to do. Going through the loss of your dad and the reflection you have had lately is tough. Keep on. It frustrates me that it takes 1200cal a day or less to lose weight, but that is my reality. Just hang on ..figure it out.

Kimberley said...

I am also in the whatever works for you camp.

The older I get the more I realize there are many, many, many truths...just depending on who is looking at what.

The hard thing for me is dealing with those who haven't awakened to the idea that other people might have a better truth.

Great post...I had to think about it overnight before I commented.

Hugs Loretta!

debby said...

Loretta, I find so much inspiration in your journey. Such a long one, and you never give up.

Anne H said...

I am in the whatever works camp too!
I think we all find that place -
But sometimes I think - there are little curious "ego" devices that keep up caught up in trouble and sabotage......
Not because we think we are "Bad".......
But maybe because we discover that we are really "Good!" inside!
And some how we are afraid.
It's not our weakness or failure that frightens us.....
It's our strength!

Still - at the end of the day, it really is all good!

Joy said...

Friend, For me, I just have to keep moving forward. Each day making good choices. No matter what it is. Good choices of what I listen to, see, eat etc. If you keep it up, before you know it, some of the choices don't happen as much and your life is filled with a lot of good choices. Have to charge forward. Don't look back and keep on fighting. You can do this!!!

Stay focused

Princess Dieter said...

I think we have to know what our bodies need and don't need. And we have to be willing to make tough choices FOR LIFE. I watched Lyn at Escape from Oesity and while I could not do MediFast (same reason, the soy), I decided to try an alternative (ie, use products similar to MediFast that were whey intensive, not soy). I found I could be less hungry and lose.

I discovered that although my DNA markers are clued in for obesity, high fat absorption, slow fat release, and the DNA recommended high carb..I do better with lower carb due to insulin resistance. I think when I was normal weight an date high carb, it didn't damage me. I thrived like my family did on high carb. BUT....when I broke my metabolism with obesity, bingeing and became prediabetic, that took precedence. So, for me, cutting out sugar and reducing starches drastically (1 serving or none a day) has made me able to drop a lot of weight since last summer and control my binge disorder.

That's what I discovered cause I didn't close my eyes to another's journey of discovery with Medifast. Medifast is not for me, but the lower carb that Medifast espouses IS...and that's what I learned. (And I used to be solidly anti-low carb back many years ago, cause it seemed faddish). Now, I understand each body has its needs..some do better on X diet and other Y. Some of us need therapy. Some of us need to just stop being children about food and using it to feel good.

I also took on the mentality that a diet is an evolving thing and you STAY ON IT FOR LIFE...that is, you never can go back to eating like you did. You go on a diet and you have to forever stay on it, but that diet, that controlled eating, evolves to adapt to physical needs and medical needs and , well, life. :)

I wish everyone well on t heir journeys with food healing...

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