DAY 59 The Power of Optimism

Hidy ho, Journal!

I remember having a conversation once with my husband on optimism vs pessimism. After agreeing on the definitions, I asked him which he thought he tended to be...I still remember being surprised at his answer:

"I am a realistic optimist!"

I love that...he refused to be put in a box...and chose instead to be who HE wanted to be...a realistic optimist... 

(click pic to enlarge)

Later I found this great quote that explained it perfectly:

"The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails."--William Arthur Ward

This is the way I want to be...aware of "facts", believing for a positive outcome, and have the courage and boldness to take ACTION,  by making healthy choices that will help me sail on towards my dreams, passions and goals. 

From Dr Phil's book:  "Gain emotional closure...refuse to live with unfinished emotional business."

My verse for today: "Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way."

My quote for today: "Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence."--Helen Keller

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 58 The DOING of the Plan

Hello there Journal,

I wrote out my Plan...now I am DOING my Plan. It is one of those "inch by inch anything is a cinch" plans...meaning it will take quite awhile to see huge changes. Rather, I am doing a little bit each day. But I AM doing it, and it feels good. That good feeling from accomplishing a thing.

But in order to do the Plan, I have to make choices as to how I will spend my time. Time is the coin of our life...and we need to spend it wisely. Once it is gone, it is GONE. Yesterday I was following The Plan (I listed it out here) and that felt good. But it felt BAD to have to tell someone sorry, I can't do that for you today, it will have to wait. Ugh...yet it was necessary. I am relieved they were very gracious about the delay.

I now realize that one thing I want to add to my original plan is...wiggle room. Wiggle room in my schedule for the unexpected, for those things that pop up that are necessary or just plain fun. That can be another Reward to getting caught up.

 This is a journey, and we are learning, growing, correcting, changing. That's a good thing. :-)

From Dr Phil's book: "You and only you choose how you feel."

My verse for today: "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you."

My quote for today: "It’s not enough to be busy, so are the ants. The question is, what are we busy about?"--Henry David Thoreau

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 57 Actions & Rewards

Hi Journal!

Saturday I talked about making a Plan to overcome my Bottleneck, and part of that included having short-term goals, and an action plan to make them happen (here).

I hadn't really planned on posting the goals. Part of me was probably afraid of the accountability...part of me was embarrassed at how they would sound...and part of me felt they would be just plain boring to anyone but me.  Guess it's time to put on my Big Girl panties and get on with it!

I had said that I needed to get a handle on Time Management, and that involved getting caught up, so I wouldn't feel the pressure to stay up, but go to bed on time.

So here is my ACTION PLAN to get caught up:

-Finish unpacking...yes, I have been here almost a year, and am still not finished. :-(

-Follow my daily cleaning routines...don't let it go because "it's not that bad, I'll do it when I have more time." More time never gets here! 

-Organize the clutter on my computer; deal with 3 files a day til caught up, then file away as I go.

-Clean the desk off in my studio...it's a cluttered mess, I don't like it, it makes ME feel messy.

-Work on my low carb recipe collection once a week, tentatively Wednesdays ....I have collected hundreds of free recipes to help me in my new healthy way of eating, yet I  usually can't find the one I want...frustration! They have been sitting in folders all piled up in a corner for months.

That is the work part...now for the REWARD part. I will have more time for these after I get caught up. 

Here are my short-term REWARD GOALS:

-Time to do a monthly illustration for my blog, like on Toon Tuesday....I have always been a slow poke at my art, so it won't be weekly unless I can learn to draw faster... I have all these ideas, and they are begging to be drawn...drawed...drew...;-)

-Time for sewing projects...I have a long list waiting to be done...I even bought a great electronic sewing machine from Craigslist, and haven't even learned how to use it yet.

-Time for painting...I have so many in my head...and I particularly want to finish one that is very meaningful to me, that I have already sketched out; the quote that is going on it is: "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life." I have hoped for so long to finally get my life back, and to finally see that longing fulfilled is wonderful. The painting will have a large elaborate tree in it...you'll just have to wait and see. ;-) 

-Time to paint cotton shirts...I have these cool designs all drawn out to paint onto cotton denim shirts with acrylic paints...this one I feel like I waited for a legitimate reason: I didn't want to paint my 5X size shirts, and then not be able to wear them later cuz they were too big!! LOL! Guess I could buy shirts that were too small now, and "grow" into them.

-Time to frame some paintings that are already finished...I have the framing equipment, but have never learned how to use it. I finally believe that in the future I will need to know this. :-)

-Time to sell stuff online...this was a matter of time and mobility. I will soon have more of both. :-)

_Time to do ongoing projects as they come up...right now I have several small projects to fix up the house, waiting in the wings, just never time to do them.

Well, that's it. It's rather daunting all written out here...but it also looks like some fun stuff, so that will keep me motivated.

And...drumroll....my Monday weigh-in: 370, for a gain of 1 lb this last week. I thought about it...I can identify 4 things that I did that contributed to it. 

One was temporary and on purpose: I stopped my exercise for 1 week to let my shoulder heal up some...it was getting worse after each exercise session. I am really happy to say it's MUCH better now, and I'm not waking up in terrible pain. So I plan to carefully start exercising again.

The other three, honestly, were my own doing...more from carelessness and getting too confident that I had the routine down...NOT!! I allowed myself to get too rushed, and was hit and miss in my morning quiet time of prayer, meditation and reading. And I allowed my schedule to get all topsy-turvy, which affected mealtimes...and I was not careful on STOPPING eating when I was satisfied, so the portions crept up.

The one good thing about committing to self-honesty is: the information is out there, not hiding in the dark. Now I can DO something about it. 

I must admit I had this "dream goal" of going the whole way without seeing a PLUS sign...maybe it's a good thing this happened. This is a result of getting careless...and that's a good lesson. It takes effort, EVERY day...I can't coast and expect excellent results. No excuses! Hopefully, lesson learned. So I can look forward to doing much much better next week.

From Dr Phil's book: "You must carve out time in your life for tension-reducing activities."

My verse for today: "You need to persevere..."

My quote for today: "If you learn from defeat, you haven't really lost."--Zig Ziglar

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 56 Day of Rest & Favorite Photo

Day 56 of ReStart,  Sunday  Oct 4, 09

Hello Journal,

I picked this photo because of the story MyGuy told me about it. He was on a camping trip near Jedediah Smith Redwoods State Park, in Northern California.

He had heard about a huge waterfall in a secluded area of the Park. So early in the morning he took off on a hike to look for it. He said he had to fight his way through shrubs as they got thicker and thicker, and he ended up crawling on his hands and knees through the undergrowth in that remote part of the forest. He suddenly emerged into what felt like a secret place, with this lovely little waterfall in it.

He loved the tranquility of the place...he said it was sooo peaceful.

(click pic to enlarge)

Special quote for a friend: "Today is not the day you quit. Nor is it the day you cry. Today you know that you have all the passion and wisdom to find that quiet center of solace, serenity and strength necessary to create and sustain an authentic life."--Sarah Ban Breathnach

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 55 The Bottleneck & The Plan

Day 55 of ReStart,  Saturday  Oct 3, 09

Hi Journal,

Over the years, in my search to "fix" me, I've read a lot of self-help books, articles on  how-to this and how-to that, newsletters from self-proclaimed personal life coaches.  Some has been helpful, some a waste of time.

One idea that I have been thinking about lately, that I think would help me is called the Theory of Constraints. Basically, it says that in any pursuit of a goal, there will be a bottleneck...that thing that slows down reaching the goal. The process either comes to a screeching halt, or goes slower than one would want.

So, the idea is to identify my main bottleneck, that thing I keep tripping over, and get it out of my path.The result of removing it is that the whole process of reaching my goal will be speeded up. The "experts" claim that concentrating my efforts on this one area is the most effective thing I can do to speed up the process of reaching a goal.

In asking myself what is holding me back...what do I keep stumbling over again and again...I would have to say, at this point in my journey, it's this time management thing. Since yesterday, I have been thinking about it a lot....running it through my imagination, and seeing how it would play out if I WERE consistent on my schedule. The imagined outcome is nice....I like it.

I made my WHY list Friday, and felt very encouraged (I talked about the WHY here). It refers to what Filippe from the Biggest Loser said: "You never do anything with all your heart unless your WHY is big enough."

I wrote at the top of a little yellow piece of paper: Hitch Your Wagon To A Star...drew a cute star next to it, and wrote out some short-term goals that improved Time Management will help me achieve very soon. 

I wanted them to be short-term goals because, well, to be honest, I need fast pay-off for my efforts, so I don't fizzle out! And they are enjoyable goals, fun ones, so that I am connecting doing something that does not come natural to me (going to bed early and getting up early, and consistently following my daily schedule) with something that feels like a REWARD. I need that connection to something enjoyable, to condition my mind and emotions to really WANT to do this.

After my little list of 6 short-term goals, I made a little list of behaviors that will help me achieve getting rid of my roadblock.  I always want to stay up at night and get things done...so I figured one way to help myself was to get caught up! I broke that down into 5 doable categories, that I will start on Monday...that's because when hubby is off work, usually on weekends, it is unrealistic to do anything extra.

I want to plan for success, not set myself up for failure by making unrealistic goals.

So, I am excited to start Monday...I won't get to play as much on the computer, but this is a worthy goal, and I am willing to pay that price. 

I feel like I am making progress...now I am off to make homemade tomato soup with the last of our homegrown tomatoes. Yummmm...

From Dr Phil's book: "Take a problem-solving approach to emotion-provoking events."

My verse for today: "So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded."

My quote for today: "Sometimes it is not good enough to do your best; you have to do what's required."--Winston Churchill

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 54 Challenge Those Thoughts & The Big Why

Hello Journal!

Today  I woke up at 1:30 pm, feeling instantly frustrated with myself...I stayed up way too late last night, into the wee hours. I heard myself whining..."I can't get my hours straigthened out...I am such a phoney."

Oh brother...did you just hear yourself, Loretta??? "Okay, I WON'T get my hours straightened out." It's a choice. Own it. And I really need to fix this, regardless of my natural night owl tendencies. My whole day goes better and I get things done and caught up when I get up earlier.

So, I will practice what I preach, and challenge those thoughts. Slow my thoughts down...listen attentively... and run these thoughts by the TBGG questionnaire (I talked about that before, here).

T...Is it true? (if true, then deal with it; if not true, then kick it out!)

B...Is it in my best interest? (to be thinking this, to believe this)

G...Is it good for my health? (both physical and mental health)

G...Does it help me reach my goals? (am I holding myself back by my own thinking)

T....is it True? Yes, I allowed my hours to get out of whack, again, but am I a phoney? Hmmmm....the dictionary says phoney is: fraudulent. And fraudulent involves deception. No, I can't accept that...I am not trying to deceive. I messed up...I am still learning...but the intention of my heart is not deceptive. 

So, no, it's not true that I am a phoney.

Yes, it is true that I still have things to learn about time management, and I need to be making better choices.

B...is it in my best interests to think this way? That I "can't" and that I'm a phoney? Obviously not. Because I CAN, and I am NOT.

G...is it good for my health? Nope, and having my hours messed up increased my frustration and stress levels, also causing a feeling of failure and embarrassment. I am annoyed at myself to find myself still dealing with this same thing AGAIN.

G...does it help me reach my goals? It does the opposite, wasting time and energy. 

For me, it seems so hard to get this sleep schedule thing straightened out, and so easy to get it messed up again! 

I have analyzed it in the past, and know that I do it because it is so enjoyable for me to stay up and putter on projects in the wee hours. It is quiet, there are no interruptions, and my natural rhythms seems to go towards those hours. 

So: if my goal is to enhance my "play time"...then stay up and have upside down sleep hours, and follow the "immature Loretta" schedule. 

But if my goal is to enhance my "new, healthy, creative and productive" me, then I want to follow the new "grown up Loretta" schedule. 

Hmmmm....just last night I had been going over some notes from a past episode of the Biggest Loser. One contestant that I really liked, Filippe, said: "You never do anything with all your heart unless your WHY is big enough."

I need my WHY...the reason I get my schedule straigthened out and kept that way...to be big enough. How?

The only way I can think of is to connect my sleep schedule with my dreams...to connect time management with my goals.  Sort of like that old saying: hitch your wagon to a star. I need to hitch my sleep schedule to something big enough that I will CHOOSE to follow good time management, looking ahead to the more exciting, creative and healthy future...my big WHY.

I hadn't thought of it that way until just now. I will definitly work on that...I am sort of excited that maybe now, looking at it in this new way, I will make progress on this. Progress...not perfection!

(Linda Henretta Designs)

From Dr Phil's book: "I have the power to choose."

My verse for today: "So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall."

My quote for today: "Discipline is remembering what you want."--David Campbell

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 53 Team Hoyt & Gratitude

Hello Journal!

When I feel the drag of everyday, the sameness, the repetition, of still waiting to get to goal, feeling tired...in other words, when I forget to focus on all the things I have for which to feel GRATEFUL....I watch the video about the father and son team, Team Hoyt.

(Linda Henretta Designs)

Dick and Judy Hoyt's son, Rick, was strangled by the umbilical cord during birth, leaving him brain-damaged and unable to control his limbs.

The doctors told them their son would be a vegetable the rest of his life, and to put him in an institution. They refused. They saw how his eyes followed them around the room, and as he grew older they kept looking for ways to help him.

They were finally able to get a computer that helped him communicate, and he told his father, an overweight self-described Porker, that he wanted them to run in a race together, the way he had seen a paralyzed schoolmate do with his father.

That is how it all began. The first race was 5 miles, and Dick did his best; he was sore for two weeks afterwards. But his life was forever changed when, after the race, his son typed out these words: "Dad,'' he typed, "when I'm running, it feels like I'm not handicapped!''

 

Dick became obsessed with giving his son that feeling as often as possible. He worked hard, and was finally in shape to run the Boston Marathon in 1981.

Since then, they have gone on to run 85 marathons!! And eight of those he has not only pushed Rick 26.2 miles in a wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dingy while swimming, and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars--all in the same day for triathlons!

This loving Father has also pulled his son cross-country skiing, taken him on his back mountain climbing, and once hauled him across the U.S. on a bike.

For all the written details, you can read (here).

The video link at the above site is broken, but (here) is the link to the Team Hoyt site, where they have a good quality video. Break out the tissues.  

 I need to be reminded...I have seen it several times now...yet it always gets me. 

From Dr Phil's book: "Get real with yourself."

My verse for today: "We must pay more careful attention...to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away."

My quote for today: "Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire."--Arnold H. Glasow

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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