Good Afternoon, Journal & Friends,
One of the saddest things about being overweight is the compromise... the "settling for less than".
I can see so very many times in my life when I settled for less than what I really wanted... the weight was a hindrance. It was sad, it was disheartening, it made ME feel less than, to settle for less than, because of the weight.
One of those times was my first marriage. I was only 17 1/2 years old, and had just moved out on my own. I was headstrong and determined, and had just left home to move in with my boyfriend. Seeing her objections were going to be ignored, my Mom agreed to help us get married. It was to be an informal "Vegas" wedding. But I still needed a dress of sorts.
I didn't want a fancy schmancy long white dress, but I DID still want something pretty. But back then, there weren't many stores that carried "pretty" dresses in my size, which I think was about a womens' size 28.
I tried on dress after dress... and in the end, gave up, crying, and settled for the only one that really fit.
I hated it... but it fit.
It was not "me"... but it fit.
It was ugly... but it fit.
So I had to settle for less than.
(Me in the settle-for dress 1969)
Yesterday, I tried on a lovely, lacy white summer jacket that had been hanging in my closet for over 3 years... because it was too small.
It is beautiful, with a cut-out lacy design. It is "me".
And I didn't have to settle, because it fit.
If you think this post is about pretty clothing, and dresses and vanity, then you don't understand. You don't understand the deep hurt of not having the freedom to be yourself in something so simple as to how you choose to clothe yourself. The outer representation of the inner you.
It's about the freedom to choose how you dress, because things fit.
It's about not having to settle for less than.
It's about feeling pretty in what you wear.
It's about the joy of seeing your hard work start to pay off.
It's about creating the kind of life you really want to live, one good choice at a time.
I may be slow getting there, but I AM getting there. And that makes me smile today.
From Dr Phil's book: "Given your goals, how does your current thinking help you get there?"
My verse for today: "A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul."
My quote for today: "When the world says Give Up, Hope whispers, Try it one more time." --author unknown
Enjoy the Journey,