July 7th I Can Do Better

What's that emo we see on the interwebs? Face palm?

(photo credit)

That's what I feel like doing today. I JUST finished visting a blog I read once in a blue moon. And scrolling down past posts, one jumped out and smacked me right between the eyes. The post title is: 

How to Succeed at Weight Loss 

(And Anything Else) 

(Link to whole post Here) 

Sounds like an infomercial, right? But here's the thing... the blog writer, Bryan Ganey, has lost nearly 400 pounds, no surgery. 

You read that right: LOST 400 lbs. So, I have to give the man some respect, and at least be open to new ideas.

But that was the problem. What he went on to say was NOT a new idea to me. Ouch... it was all too familiar, in fact.

I looked up from the computer screen, and saw the little yellow sticky note I had stuck where I could see it every day. It was slightly curling at the edges, and dated 7/30/12.  I felt rather... I don't know... foolish feels about right... as I read it:

Make a Schedule... and FOLLOW IT!

Make a Menu.........and FOLLOW IT!

Yep, it was exactly what Bryan Ganey had posted about. Exactly.  Have a routine, and then follow it. Sigh...

The problem is, without the "doing" part, having a cute little sticky note with good advice doesn't do a bit of good. If I had taken CONSISTANT ACTION when following the instructions on that sticky note, I would have been at my goal weight now, and a lot healthier.

Consistent Action. That sounds familiar to me, too, as I type it out. Must've done a post about that, too. :-}

I've kept a daily "to do" list for decades. 

Planned my projects.

Made lists.

Made plans.

And here I sit, admitting it is just wasted ink without the follow through.

I can do better.

I can follow through. Like Mr Ganey writes, if we do that day after day after day... we will eventually see results. It will add up. 

I know I've written about this before. I've even "tried" before. But I think we must learn in layers... in levels. Hard to explain. But maybe we just have to ready for that next step. Be willing for that next step.

I'm not going to get all jazzed up and write out yet another plan or list or program. I've done all that. I'm just going to DO the part I haven't been consistent in doing:

FOLLOW IT.

I highly recommend Mr Ganey's post. Very good kick in the tush if you are struggling.

Never quit,

Loretta

APRIL 10th ReCharge & ReFocus Time

Hi Journal & Friends,

I've been wanting to do something for myself for years and years, yet always put it off, thinking it should be "earned". Such as a reward for when I got to X amount of weight loss.

Last week, I realized that I was worth it NOW. Sure, goals with little rewards along the way are fun. But this was different. I felt almost punished for having to wait so long. So... I did it. What did I do??

I couple of weeks ago, I went to a "real" hair salon and got my hair cut by a "real" hairdresser. Then last week I returned and had her put in "real" caramel highlights. 

It might not sound like a big deal to some of you, but it's been over THIRTY YEARS since I darkened the doors of what we used to call a Beauty Parlor. And I was nervous. But she was so nice and patient, and I feel maaahhhavelous that I did it!

Here are before pics:

And here's the after:

It doesn't look like "my" idea of caramel, but I like it fine. Maybe next time I should take a "paint chip" in with me. :-D 

Lastly, I just wanted to mention that I plan on taking the rest of April off from this blog, and do some thinking and catching up. 

I'm excited and motivated, and want to do some long-term planning. I might pop in occasionally to read a few blogs, and will try to keep up with my art blog (Here)  . And I'll probably sneak a peek on Facebook (my Facebook page)  now and then... but my intent is to hugely reduce my computer time. 

So... I hope you all have a wonderful April. I sure plan to! See all you wonderful people in May.

My book quote for today: "Being a warrior is not about the act of fighting. It's about being so prepared to face a challenge and believing so strongly in the cause you are fighting for that you refuse to quit." --Richard Machowicz, Unleash The Warrior Within

My verse for today: "Blessed are the people whose God is the Lord."

My quote for today:  "If you want to get there, you can't be a shrinking violet." --Craig Sigl

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 967

JAN 15 The Big Six Oh

Hi Journal & Friends,

So... it's my Day of Birth. 

I am better (well, other than mindlessy eating all those salted almonds Friday night, and just finally losing track and giving up trying to count calories!!). I've done a lot of soul searching, and listened for the answers to my cry for HELP.

I received the same type of message from 9 different sources! Sheesh... you'd think I was hard-headed or sumpthin! Who, me??

In summary:

-Change my paradigm, how I look at it, my personal truth.  

-Let go of the past. I've learned from it, now it's time to let go of regrets, and look forward.

-Accept what is, what I can't change. But also know that every good choice equals Making It Better... a better future.

-Act, don't react. As part of that, I am no longer putting the DAY number of this journey at the top of my blog. It will now go at the bottom of the post, just for my reference, but not blaring in my face the first thing. I feel better about that now... it is a gift to myself.

-Forgive myself. For real this time. Completely, lovingly, with compassion and understanding. Just like I'd give to someone else who needed it. 

-Remember... remember my dream.

A few days before I gave up sugar and flour in March of 2009, I had a vivid dream. When I woke up, I not only remembered it, I knew what it meant, no doubts. 

In this dream I felt that God was encouraging me that it was not too late for me to change. When I asked "to change what?" I immediately knew that it was not too late to change my thinking. 

That Strength and encouragement were being offered. That I was to choose strength "in spite of". That the double portion of joy offered was mine to choose, to give me strength.

That from now on opposition was an opportunity to get stronger and more determined to succeed.

I suppose over time, I've tended to forget the dream. But it's come back to me, and I'm thankful. You wouldn't think I'd forget something that remarkable to me, would you?! Sigh....

So, that's my choice. To believe the old voices in my head... or to believe the dream. The NEW paradigm that says I Can Do Hard Things (I saw that on Chris's blog, and really like it!).

I choose to look forward, to let go of the past and the "what might have beens".

This has not come easy... it's been a wrestle, a breaking. But I finally feel some peace now.

I watched Star Trek, The Undiscovered Country last night, and realized for the first time where they got the title from for the movie. A character in the movie referred to the FUTURE as The Undiscovered Country. And at the end of the movie, when they were deciding what to do and Chekhov asked Captain Kirk what their heading was... Captain Kirk answered: 

"Second star to the right... and straight on til morning."

And they were off to another grand adventure. That is what I am choosing. To look forward, not back. To look for my grand adventure. I don't know just what that means yet... 

From Dr Phil's book: "What is true about you in your mind, you will live."

My verse for today: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

My quote for today: "The future is not some place we are going to, but one we are creating." --John Schaar

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 520

DAY 508 The Boring But Useful CHECKLIST

Good Afternoon, Journal & Friends,

When I had my first hand surgery back in October of 09, they did something I found amusing... yet I was glad they did it. 

Each person along the chain of events initialed my hand/wrist in ink... right on my skin. Including me, the nurses, and even the surgeon, all prior to the surgery. They were absolutely determined to get it right! Or, in this case left... it was on my left hand. ;-)

They had a checklist, and this was one way to make sure they didn't slice and dice the wrong body part. They didn't leave it to chance, to memory, or even to "procedure". They followed a checklist, and that checklist said that each person had to initial the body part to make sure it was the RIGHT body part.

Well... recently I read about a book written by Dr Atul Awande, titled "The Checklist Manifesto: How to Get Things Right." It was fascinating! And had a lot of the truths I could apply to my own journey.

Here are some excerpts, bolded emphasis mine, that I found interesting. It's long, but worth it:

"Despite showing (hospital) staff members of the benefits of using the checklist, 20% resisted stating that it was not easy to use, it took too long and felt it had not improved the safety of care. Yet, when asked an additional question - would you want the checklist to be used if you were having an operation - a full 93% said yes." 

"In a world in which success now requires large enterprises, teams of clinicians, high-risk technologies, and knowledge that outstrips any one person's abilities, individual autonomy hardly seems the ideal we should aim for. ..what is needed, however is discipline...

Discipline is hard - harder than trustworthiness and skill and perhaps even than selflessness. We are by nature flawed and inconstant creatures. We can't even keep from snacking between meals. We are built for novelty and excitement, not for careful attention to detail. Discipline is something we have to work at." 

"We don't study routine failures...when we look closely, we recognize the same balls being dropped over and over, even by those of great ability and determination. We know the patterns. We see the costs. It's time to try something else. Try a checklist." 

"We're obsessed in medicine with having great components, the best drugs, the best devices, the best specialists - but pay little attention to how to make them fit together well"" 

"It somehow feels beneath us to use a checklist, an embarrassment. It runs counter to deeply held beliefs about how the truly great among us - those we aspire to be - handle situations of high stakes and complexity. The truly great are daring. They improvise. They do not have protocols and checklists. Maybe our idea of heroism needs updating." 

So, being one always on the lookout for useful tools along this journey, I made myself a Checklist template with the stuff I'm working on each day. Like I mentioned before, I don't expect perfection each day. But I know me: if I have it written down, easily accessible, and can check it off as I go, I will accomplish MORE than if I were to try to remember it all hit and miss. (can click pics to enlarge)

I have the big size I want to keep, one for each month, in a notebook. But I also printed out a small "working" copy to stick in a pocket, or doodle on, throughout the day. Just to make it practical and doable. 

And there is something in me that enjoys checking stuff off a list! So there is that fun factor, that sense of accomplishment. 

At the end of 2011, I expect to look back and say "Wow! What a great idea that was... look at all I have accomplished. All these small daily goals added up to big changes at the end of the year!"

Try it, you might like it.

From Dr Phil's book: "It's about changing yourself from the inside out."

My verse for today: "Praise the Lord, for the Lord is good; sing praise to his name, for that is pleasant."

My quote for today: "If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good." --Dr Seuss

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 430 NOT a Day of Rest & NOT My Favorite Photo!

Hi Journal & Friends,

Taking today to get lots of little loose ends tied up before my hand surgery tomorrow, so I guess it's turning out to NOT be a day of rest.

A while back someone had a post about our drivers licenses, and I went and dug mine out. Yikes! I realized that it was old and needed updating.

Thing is... I lied. If you knew me in real life, you would know the one thing I hate most of all is a Liar. It is the ultimate in disrespect to be lied to! But here, on my license... yes, I had lied. I just wouldn't do it... I just wouldn't tell them 400 something! I think I was around 425, I'm not sure.

But I justified my lie by telling myself the I would "soon" be 398, so it was okay. Uh huh. Here then is the infamous Drivers License pic:

(can click to enlarge)

And guess what? That is the self-same red shirt I have on here, about 95 pounds later, LOL! Yeah... I need some new clothes!

Not sure when I'll be feeling like typing much again. Maybe soon, maybe not. I'll just play it by ear and see how my hand heals up.

Today's Peek at the Past (Interesting... tomorrow is my hand surgery, and in this post I was talking about losses that have interfered with my art. Yet, I still am here and still create. I am like the Borg Seven of Nine: I will adapt!)

From Day 69, October 17, 2009:

...after making peace with my Mom's death, I arrived at a turning point. I revamped my goals, and made discoveries about myself based on the answers to these questions:

• what do I enjoy?
• what makes me smile?
• what makes me feel good?
• what makes me feel satisfied, fulfilled?
• what is "worth it", of eternal value, not a wasted life?
• what makes me feel "this is ME", this is who I am supposed to be in this life?

When things in life slam us in the face, and bring us to our knees, if we allow it there can rise up from the experience a newness...a sort of rebirth. This can be ours if we take the time to look at our life... to heal... to ask questions... to slow down and THINK, and reflect, and LISTEN to the answers.

(For complete post "Ask the Questions, Listen for the Answers" click HERE) 

From Dr Phil's book: "I do not want you to think too much about the number of pounds you want to lose. What I want you to focus on is requiring more of yourself, starting right now."

My verse for today: "You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you."

My quote for today: "Deja-Moo:  The feeling that you've heard this bull before."

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 366 Remembering My Why

Hi there Journal & Friends,

Have you ever been smacked upside the head by your OWN words??! I was...last night.

I had been trying to figure out why I was struggling again this week with consistency with my food. Then last night I read the post by Chris, at A Deliberate Life.

Sometimes we just have to hear it said differently to "get it". Yep, I had taken my eyes off the prize. I heard what Chris was saying, and it clicked for me.

Yes, Chris, I hear you!

She said if your consistency is lacking, check your motivation. Your REASON for doing this.

Sean Anderson talks a lot about consistency, too. And he refers to "motivating thoughts" as his source of motivation.

I tend to refer to it as my "Why" for doing this.

We all have our own terminology, but it's all the same message: You must have your OWN powerful internal motivating reasons for making these healthy changes. Powerful enough to see you through the tough times.

And the tough times WILL come. If you think you are different and won't face them, you're fooling yourself. We all have ups and downs... it's called LIFE. How we handle it is the make-or-break of it.

After I read Chris' post last night, I re-read my own post from Day 82, called The HOW & The WHY.

Ouch! That's when it hit me... I was trying so hard to learn to "live in the moment" and all that... I had neglected my dreams, my goals. I know it's a parallel truth... they must both be a part of my thinking. I just need to figure it out a little better! How to integrate them both into my thinking at the same time. Every day. When I get busy, I tend to neglect this.

For me, I NEED to dream, to imagine the future me, to "see" it. And to somehow do the daily living part now, yet not lose the dreaming part. That's what I'm working on. Tips and hints gladly accepted! LOL!

(real treehouses in Eureka, California)

From Dr Phil's book: "Problems don't get better with inattention."

My verse for today: "The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge."

My quote for today: "All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." --Walt Disney

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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