The other day MyGuy was trying to get some paperwork all together to send in for a rebate. This naturally involved me, since he is mildly dyslexic and paperwork is a major hassle to him. So, it's always my job to do any writing.
Well, he was in a hurry, frustrated, and was confusing himself AND me. I wasn't helping the situation, either, by getting irritated. In typical guy style, he started losing his cool. But then he started doing something that I just refused to accept. He started muttering to himself that he was just stupid. He said it a couple of times, and I lost it! I told him "if you say that one more time I'll come over there and smack you!"
And he DID say it again... and I jokingly smacked him on the back of the head. The tension dissolved, and I told him "no, you are NOT stupid... you are tired, in a hurry, frustrated... but you are NOT stupid!"
Words have power. We need to listen to ourselves.
Do you remember things that were said to you when you were a kid, or younger?
I do. Hurtful words have a way of leaving a brand on you, seared into your memory.
As an adult, I can consider the source, resolve it and let go of the hurt... but I still remember. It took a lot of years to heal some of those scars left by words.
Like...
*Who do you think you are? (from an adult that was supposed to love and protect me, but was not)
*You are too fat to do as you say (from other children in the 5th grade, while I was doing an assigned task on the playground)
*Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about (from someone that could have used that opportunity to teach me how to deal with feelings in a healthy way rather than eating them numb)
*Oh look, a moo cow (from a man I walked in front of, on my way to a New Year's Eve party, after spending 2 hours getting all dolled up and feeling good about myself--until that instant)
And on they go. We all have them, and some people have had the unimaginable said to them.
But now, as an adult, we have a choice... to choose if we will speak/think/write words of LIFE.
When I have issues, I don't run to the computer and blurt it all out immediately. I work it out first, between me and my God. Or at least, I try. Sometimes we just must accept the "mystery of why". We don't always get answers, at least right away. This journey is a learning process.
Anyway, that's the way my blog rolls. I choose to wrestle with things, for the most part, before they are forever committed to permanency. I want my blog to be encouraging... I actually go back sometimes and re-read certain entries. I NEED it to be encouraging. And I sincerely hope it helps others on this road. It can be a grueling trip some days!
When I started, I wrote just to me. Later I realized a few people were reading it, also. And I hoped that others like me who had a lot to lose would be encouraged to never quit... to fight for themselves... that it can be done.
I have been "given up on" by a lot of people in my past. And one thing I know, is that if you just keep going, you WILL get there, sooner or later. I wanted to pass on that hope, that determination, and not give up on people.
Words have power. Use them with care. Use them for life, and love, and for blessings.
The ancients knew this truth. They not only had curses to speak over people, but blessings they spoke over loved ones.
Irish Blessing:
May the roads rise to meet you.
May the wind be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
The rain fall soft upon your fields.
And, until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
From Dr Phil's book: "You talk to yourself more than everybody else in your life combined."