Monday, August 17, 2009

DAY 8 Protect Your Success & No Whining!

Hi Journal,

Finally! It is my first weekly weigh-in day since my big ReStart. I was so excited this morning, I could hardly wait!
And the answer is: 384, meaning I lost 4 lbs this last week. Yay!!! I am hoping to keep up a good momentum, so that by my next birthday in Jan 2010, I can finally bust out of the 3's into the 2's...that is one of my medium range goals.

Well, the next topic on my "need to be CONSISTENT" list required me to ask hubby's permission to "talk about him"...mwa-ha ha ha ha... Actually, he didn't keep the worried look on his face too long, once I explained the whole topic.

It has to do with "not letting anyone rob my success from me" un-eloquent way of saying saboteur, one who engages in sabotage. But I always need to drag out the dictionary every darned time I try to type saboteur, so I'll just stick to "not letting anyone rob my success from me"! :-D

Anyway, Dr Phil's book has a long chapter on different types of saboteurs, and ways to deal with them. I'll just stick to my life...and close to home, the one that impacts my life the most, MyGuy.

You see, I USED to think of him as a saboteur...and how convenient was own living, breathing excuse! Don't you feel sorry for my situation?? I don't have support at home... oh poor me. And the classic: it's HAARRRDDD.

When I made the big decision to switch to the Low Carb way of eating, the advice was the same everywhere: get the stuff OUT of your house that might tempt you. But they don't address the "mixed" households...ones where one or more persons--of voting age--are NOT eating low carb. Umm...he's not a child...I can't order him what to eat...he is a grown man with his own preferences.

We sat down and had a talk, and I explained to my husband that I was going to eat low carb, and why...that this was life or death for me, and I NEEDED to do this. After some thought, he looked me right in the eye, and said: "I LOVE my carbs...I am not giving up my carbs!"

Though I kept it to myself, for awhile I felt sabotaged (yep, I looked in the dictionary again). I was such a martyr...I told my doctor of my new plan, and the "lack of support" at home, and the RESISTANCE I felt I always got when trying to change...and oh! what sympathy I got!

But the more I thought about it...and whined to God...the more I realized that I had no right to expect him to change just because I needed to, or even that HE needed to shed a couple of pounds himself. Did I like someone else imposing their plan on ME?? Did I like the feeling of subtle criticism that comes when you know someone else doesn't approve of your choices??

I think God finally got through to me one day after I was whining to Him about it, and I suddenly thought about exercise...and resistance training. You know...the kind with rubber resistance bands. It takes RESISTANCE to build muscle. No resistance, no progress, no increase in strength. I then remembered what Maya Angelou said:

If you don't like it..change it.
If you can't change it,
change the way you think about it!

So, I could look at MyGuy's resistance to my new way of eating as

an OPPORTUNITY to get stronger!

He has actually been very patient with me, as I have made the switch. There were foods--and still are some--that I just can't be around without feeling them call my name! He has not complained about the sudden cessation of homebaked desserts...and I am determined not to complain when he brings "stuff" home, as long as he doesn't wave it under my nose. :-)

I have had to learn to live with the "enemy" right in my own, not MyGuy...I mean the carbs that I overate all my life, that were the reason I ended up at 460 lbs at one time! It took me a long time to see the pattern...that ALL of my problem foods were heavy in carbs, whether they were sweets or savory. The common denominator was carbs.

But this has made my resolve stronger in the long run. My struggle now is not the carbs...I am doing pretty well there. No sugar or flour type stuff since March 09. Now I am working on portion sizes of the things that I AM eating. For awhile I fell into the trap of thinking "it's okay, it's low carb", and eating way too much!! Gee, wonder why I've been slow to lose weight....Ya think??

Anyway, it's all about choices. I don't want to use ANYONE as an excuse to be robbed of my success...not family, friends, doctors...anyone. So I chose to change the way I thought about the resistance. As Michael Beckwith says:

"In every life circumstance,
look for the Blessin' or the Lesson".

It turned out to be a Blessing that MyGuy offered what I perceived as made me stronger.

It turned out the Lesson was that "one size does NOT fit all"...meaning that just because low carb is for ME, does not mean it is for everyone. And I have no business expecting a grown man to follow MY choices just because that would make it easier for me, or even because I think it would be healthier for him.

I have learned a lot from Lisa at her 24-7 Low Carb Diner blog. She cooks for herself and her "boys", but they are not all low-carbers. She does NOT make two separate meals, but has learned how to make a couple of add-ons to the main meal, or a simple tweak, so they are all happy. And she shares all that in her blog and her wonderful e-book cookbook, which I bought. She designed it so she would not have to spend her LIFE in the kitchen cooking, and the recipes are geared so that you have stuff already made for a couple of more meals...planned left-overs if you will. I appreciate all that I have learned from her.

And shock of shocks...MyGuy asked me last night about the jellos that he has been having me make for him to take to work. He said "they are actually just jelled sugar, right?? Is there a way to make them without the sugar?" (we don't use sugar-free-full-of-aspartame products in our house... if you'd like to know why, click here ). So I get to make him some of MY jello, using knox gelatin, and see what he steps, baby steps. :-)

So, Week 2 is off an' running...I feel encouraged.

From Dr Phil's book: With routines..."you design your life so that it pulls for you when you're weak, when you're not pumped up, when you don't feel like behaving maturely, when you don't want to tell yourself 'no'."

My verse for today: "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!"

My quote for today: "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face...You must do the thing you cannot do." --Eleanor Roosevelt

Enjoy the good choice at a time,


1 comment:

Amber said...

Thank you for sharing and commenting on my blog. I am so grateful for those who are vulnerable and share their hearts out on the internet. It is helping me be brave to face my fears.

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