DAY 169 Weekly Update & Choosing Joy

Hi there Journal & Friends,

Another Monday, another weigh in. Did you ever just want it to be over? To be done with it? To be at goal and get ON with life?? I feel that way sometimes. I'm not sure the root of that feeling... Impatience?? Boredom?? Frustration that it's taking so long??

All I can do is one day at a time. Actually, one choice at a time. To keep going, keep believing, keep dreaming. 

Some days the connection to my dreams seems so... delicate. So... just out of reach. Like if I am not careful, it will evaporate.

On those days, like today, I choose to re-connect. To make the effort to bust out of the doldrums. To partake of positive platitudes... ha ha ha

And to remember that "feelings" are not in the drivers seat on this journey. Belief is... and Will, and Determination. 

They lead, the feelings follow.  

And when the feelings get out of line and get stubborn and childish, and refuse to follow, then I need to just choose to continue, to be consistent, regardless. 

Feelings are great "indicators"... they offer information, and I appreciate that. But in my experience they are not always dependable.  I can ask "what am I feeling?" when I want to chow down, and it helps me understand... to deal with it instead of eating it. But I don't give feelings a license to drive my car on this journey to health, because too often they steer me off into the ditch!!

I had another very good calorie week. I only went over my limit once, by 12 calories, because I am crummy at adding numbers in my head. So I am pleased with that part of it. I still need to improve on how I spend that calorie budget... choosing even more veggies and fruits.

My weigh in this morning was 355, for a gain of 2 pounds. I know I ate great and exercised, so I know this is temporary. But still... I have to CHOOSE not to let it bug me. 

You see? I don't just write a bunch of theory and spout off stuff I have plagiarized off the internet. LOL! This is stuff I have to LIVE, every day. It really is stuff I believe in, and have to put to good use all the time. 

One of the things I did this morning was listen to some nice music while I made MyGuys meals to take to work. This one song in particular, "Good to Me", lifted me up, and reminded me to stop grumbling. In light of all others are going through, I have nothing to complain about! It talks about God being my Rock, and my strength. I really liked it. 

From Dr Phil's book: "No matter what happens, I'll stay the course. If I do what is required, I will succeed."

My verse for today: "Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise."

My quote for today: "People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing--tha's why we recommend it daily." --Zig Ziglar

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 168 Day of Rest & Favorite Photo

 Hello Journal & Friends,

I've been thinking about some things lately, like determination, commitment, importance level. So, along those lines I made this poster from a pic I found, for today's Favorite Photo. 

I love this little guy...he is doing what others told him was impossible. Against all odds, he is flying!

I know how he feels... having been overweight all my life...failed so many times before... been told it's too late... the "statistics" are stacked against me. 

But against all odds, I am flying!

I hope you like him!

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 167 Are You Contagious & Choosing a Winning Attitude

Hello Journal & Friends!

Are you contagious?

I've heard for years that attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?

On this journey to health, I must admit that I am very careful what I fill my mind with... our thinking can make or break us. Getting rid of "stinking thinking" will make all the difference in the world.

Every day I try to do something, anything, that will add fuel to the fires of my determination. If you think you can coast along without that extra effort, you are fooling yourself. Sooner or later it will catch up with you. I know... because the minute I get complacent or lazy, those old thoughts creep up on me, too,  and start whispering in my ear. :-O

No one can be "up"  24/7. There are the normal currents, the ebbs and flows of life... that's normal.

It's fun when on the UP swing, bubbling, and full of enthusiasm. But other times, it might be a quiet confidence.

And then there are those times when I'm not feeling a thing, at least on the surface. Or times when I feel discouraged.

But here's the thing...you don't have to let it stay. We are not victims. We have choices.

 Think of it as a visitor knocking at the door of your home. Once you discover it's identity, you have the choice as whether or not to invite it in.

 If it's Mr Self Pity... too many times I have invited him in and thrown a party... a pity party. I've sent out invitations to friends by whining about poor me, my situation, boo hoo, and wallowing in all the "oh you poor baby's" that come rolling in. I'm not talking about just letting people know where you're at... I talking about wallowing in it. 

Evict the undesirables from your head! 

Choose your focus.. do something that will feed the healthy feelings, uplifting attitudes, motivating thoughts. 

• Have it written down somewhere... 
• 
  
• Have a go-to place on the internet where you know you can get fed good stuff.
• 
  
• Have some really upbeat blogs to visit that you've bookmarked.
• 
  
• Try the Daily Motivator, by Ralph Marston (in my sidebar)
• 
  
• Read the Bible? Dust it off and dive into the Psalms.

Do SOMETHING pro-active, don't just float downstream like a dead fish, and allow the negativity to grow bigger and stronger. 

You may think that being passive is doing nothing. Wrong!

Actually being passive IS a decision. By choosing to DO NOTHING to fight against the drag of negative thoughts, you HAVE done something... you chose to go along, to not fight, to give in, to let it have it's way with you. 

 If you let it go on too long, it wipes out hope, kills enthusiasm, and saps energy. You begin to sound like Eeyore, from Winnie the Poo stories. And the sad part is... you might not even hear yourself. 

We ALL have ups and downs, but some people STAY down. They might not even know they have a choice. Other than being caused by a medical condition, it's a choice as to whether or not we wallow in the mud or not. 

It's a choice to make the effort to stay positive. And it DOES take effort.

When you are hugely overweight, in physical pain, or other challenges, it IS harder. You have to make up your mind you will fight for your very life! And part of that is changing what kind of thoughts you allow to live in your head.

These are tough words. It has taken me a lifetime to bust free, to take back my life. I passionately wish I could carry everyone along with me, to pour hope and enouragement into them, and set their hearts on FIRE with enthusiasm. But unless they took up the torch and carried it on themselves, the flame would soon sputter out.

 If I come on too strong and unintentionally offend, please know it's because I care so very much. Passivity will get you nowhere. Life--and this journey to health--is like a boomerang... you get back what you throw out there. To succeed, you MUST throw some effort into it.

We can DO this. It is a choice. It may not always be easy, but it IS doable.

Make no mistake about it...the battle is won or lost between the ears.

From Dr Phil's book: "I'm not powerless over this behavior. I'm in charge of myself. I have to choose what's more important: reactive overeating or taking care of my health. It's my choice, and I can do something about it."

My verse for today: "A cheerful heart is good medicine."

My quote for today: "If you want to be successful then mimic successful people. If you want to be healthy then do what healthy people do." --Dave Ramsey

DAY 166 Challenge Update & Resisting the Nibbles

Hello Journal & Friends,

It's Friday already, and time to file my Perfect 10 Challenge  report. Can't believe it's been 3 weeks already!

I did fairly well on my goal for the challenge this week, which was to exercise 6 days per week. But for some reason, I goofed up, and reversed what I did. I ended up with 4 days doing exercise DVD's, and 3 sessions on the mini-trampoline. I guess I was just having too much fun with Billy Blanks TaeBo! (Sorry Richard Simmons, I've been seeing another man).

One thing I realized, after reading something Olivia said here on her blog, Sassy & Thin in 2010  was that I was getting "comfortable" with my exercise. I was not PUSHING it. To make progress requires effort, not getting comfortable. I appreciate being to read the different blogs... I learn so much from you all, and it sparks ideas and challenges me to do better.

The other thing that bugged me this week was one time I started to nibble on the food I was making for MyGuy's meals to take to work. Yikes! I didn't have the calories to spend, and wasn't even thinking... just took a bite to see if it was okay. Then realized that I had no calories left!! THEN tried to tell myself, well, since you ate one bite and will have to fess up, you might as well fess up for TWO bites...

Good grief, old habits die hard! By the start of the THIRD bite, I actually spit it out into the sink, and had to tell myself to stop it! It's kind of scarey to think that  I can be that close to the edge, and it doesn't take much to shove me right over the cliff! 

This is too important to play around with "bites".

This means too much to me to be listening to stinking thinking that tries to justify it by saying "but you are truly hungry", and know one would know.

This is worth more to me than a bite of krab... it was not even REAL crab, but that fake stuff no less!!

Until I am so changed, and the new healthy habits are so ingrained, I really need to be more careful, to make the effort to stay focused ESPECIALLY in the kitchen around food. My mind was elsewhere, listening to a great book on CD, and not staying aware, just going with what tasted yummy in the moment. I will pay more attention next time!!

The Perfect 10 Challenge has us tell something about ourselves each week you probably don't know... hmmm...

I have a dorky collection of plastic patio lights. Yep, the plastic ones in the silly shapes. Only I hang them in my studio, and turn them on in the evening. I have always had a thing for colored lights. Since I only get to see Christmas lights one month out of the year, I decided to cover the other 11 months with these goofy lights. Oh, such classy decor...

I have pink flamingos, black & white moo cows, red hot chili peppers, American flags, parrots, lighthouses, tropical trees and pineapples, angels, and several others.

Here is a picture of the sunflowers that are up right now:

What can I say... they are cheerful!

From Dr Phil's book: "I'm not powerless over this behavior. I'm in charge of myself."

My verse for today: "Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips."

My quote for today:  "Prepare and prevent, don't repair and repent." --Author unknown

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 165 Yet Another Misleading Diet Book

Hi Journal & Friends,

Yesterday I received an email from an assistant editor at a book publishing company,  asking me to review a diet book, and then give some away.  Huh? Me? Apparently he saw I had lost a few pounds, and thought it would lend credibility to their product.

I would be curious as to your opinions... I learn so much from all of you, and this was a first for me! Here is the email I sent back to him:

Hi Mr-Fake-Name (So-I-Don't-Get-Sued),

Thanks for visiting my blog. I found your email very interesting, after I overcame the reflex to automatically hit the delete button. 

I watched the YouTube video link you provided, and went to the website with the screaming yellow and red decor. Eye catching, for sure.

Okay, here's the deal. I say what I mean, and I mean what I say.  I try to be honest. With myself, and with others. I am not even sure you would want that kind of "reviewer".  But my good name is more important than money... integrity is paramount.

So, here is my first knee-jerk reaction to all the info I have read/seen today on this book (without having the benefit of actually reading the book):

1. Hey, I did that, too... no flour/no sugar

2. This guy is quite the entertainer

3. I enjoyed the info and entertaining way it was presented in the video.

4. But was highly irritated by the website... because:

--Annoying shouting, tacky colors and layout

--Too good to be true presentation

--It's low carb, but no where admits that, like it's trying to repackage an old concept and present it as something new he discovered = deceptive feeling

--It's only offering HALF the answer

That last one was the deciding factor for me. The book, according to the video and the website, focuses on the external means of change: diet and exercise (though

 some of the testimonials flaunted the fact that they lost weight WITHOUT exercise).

For the average person with a little extra lard, fine. That'll do the trick. But for a whole huge (no pun intended) chunk of the population, it is the INNER changes that are necessary to KEEP THE WEIGHT OFF.

No way on God's green earth am I going to support a weight loss method that does NOT include the inner changes--in thinking, attitude, emotions, beliefs--that are needed to make the weight loss permanent.

I have lost over 100 pounds 3 previous times in my life, with "diets", only to regain it all and then some. Why would I inflict that kind of hurt onto others???

A "diet" is something that you go ON, and at the end of it you go OFF of it. And then you REGAIN it all back unless... UNLESS, you have made permanent inner changes.

People don't get to be the size I was--460 pounds--without having inner issues. We used food as a drug of choice... a coping mechanism... a way to numb feeling, to escape, to avoid... whatever you want to call it.

Take away the food, and you are left with the feelings! Now what?? We need to face our stuff, not stuff our face.

We need to do the inner work necessary, and for most people just starting on this journey to find themselves, they need a track to run on... a guide... a simple plan to help them sort it out. It took me a heartbreaking number of years to stumble upon the answers for myself, and then finally the rest of the answers from Dr Phil's book The Ultimate Weight Loss Solution. 

I didn't follow his nutritional plan, instead I did no sugar/no flour. But the simple plan he offered for Right Thinking and Healing Feelings was life changing for me.

So go back to your author, and tell him WHY I refused to be associated with his book. And if he DOES address these issues in his book, WHY DIDN'T HE SAY SO ON HIS WEBSITE??

I'll tell you why: that kind of work takes time and effort, and facing ourselves, and it can be uncomfortable, but worth it. And HE touted all over his website how EASY AND FAST it will be. 

Sure, it will be. They will lose LOTS of water and a little fat, fast and easy. He doesn't bother to explain that it is not all FAT LOSS. Big difference. Does he think people are stupid??

But after all the fast and easy "weight" loss, then what?? 

They will be right back where they started, looking for the next fast and easy answer to their heartache.

This is too important to me... it is life and death for some of us. I have been fat ever since I was a baby. I was put on my first diet at age 10. I could fill oceans with the tears I have cried.

I am PASSIONATE about telling people the truth. And this book is ONLY HALF OF THE TRUTH.

And... it is not even the most IMPORTANT half, at that!!

Sorry, but I am giving you the respect of telling you the bottomline truth. Your book will be a flash-in-the-pan success, because it only deals with the external part of the plan, and neglects the internal part.

Which is like a car without an engine. How far do you think you can push that vehicle without an engine???? You will eventually poop out, and walk off to look for a different, better, easier car to get you to where you want to go.

Respectfully,

Loretta Stephenson

Not Your Average Reviewer

From Dr Phil's book: "Are your thoughts, beliefs, and attitudes moving you closer to what you want?"

My verse for today: "I am watching to see that my word is fulfilled."

My quote for today: "Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so." --Douglas Adams

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

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DAY 164 Squirrels & Life Laws

Hello Journal & Friends,

I am such a squirrel!!

I tend to keep things, squirreling them away, and am always coming across scraps of paper with notes on them that I wrote eons ago. 

I recently found one dated Sept 6, 1985! Here is the part that caught my eye: "From now on my constructive outlet for stress will be: water & exercise."

I crack myself up sometimes!! Oh, how I wish I had added consistent ACTION to that declaration. I am not down on myself at all. I am more than a little amused... but in a good way. 

Ya know what? That Loretta back then had already "failed" so many times (with more to come, little did she know) and yet there she was, gearing up for another attempt. Gathering her strength, for yet another battle. I have to give her credit for trying! She would try, get knocked down, and get up again. Try again... get knocked down, get up again, and eventually try again. SHE NEVER GAVE UP. She kept coming back. 

And eventually SHE turned into ME. And I finally found what worked for me. Because I didn't quit... I kept trying to learn... I kept going. No matter what.

I've been talking quite a bit lately about Dr Phil. Hope I don't sound like a groupie! I just appreciate the material, though I admit I rarely watch the tv shows much any more, unless they are weight related.

But the written material: excellent. Simple, down-to-earth, not a lot of psycho-babble. Just do-able stuff that you can apply to your life, right here and now. For those of you who love the fancy labels, he actually uses a lot of cognitive behavioral therapy techniques. But for the rest of us peons, it's good old-fashioned horse sense. 

He's written a series called The Ten Life Laws. I had planned to write about them sometime, but this one sort of fits my train of thought today:

Life Law #5: 

Life rewards action.

Strategy:  Make careful decisions and  then pull the trigger.  Learn that the world couldn't care less about thoughts without actions.

Talk is cheap. It's what you do that determines the script of your life.  Translate your insight, understandings and awareness into purposeful, meaningful, constructive actions.  They are of no value until then.  Measure yourself and others based on results--not intentions or words.

Use any pain you have to propel you out of the situation you are in and to get you where you want to be. The same pain that burdens you now could be turned to your advantage.  It may be the very motivation you need to change your life.

Decide that you are worth the risk of taking action, and that your dreams are not to be sold out.  Know that putting yourself at risk may be scary, but it will be worth it.  You must call upon yourself to leave behind the comfortable and familiar if you are to move onward and 

upward.

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Any time I get stuck, I can count on The Ten Life Laws for a reality check, and a swift kick in the pants that gets me going again. (Here) is a link to all ten of them... enjoy your reality check! mwa ha ha ha ha

From Dr Phil's book: "Are your thoughts, beliefs, and attitudes moving you closer to what you want?"

My verse for today: "Make love your aim."

My quote for today: "Ideas not coupled with action never become bigger than the brain cells they occupied." --Arnold H Glasgow