Tuesday, September 27, 2011

SEPT 27th Challenging MySELF

Good afternoon Journal & Friends,

To paraphrase ShakespeareTo Challenge, or not to Challenge, that is the question.

At the risk of sounding redundant, let me say this yet again: This is a journey... we are at different stages, not all at the same place. I believe we need stay true to ourselves, and do what's healthy for ourSELVES, and not get distracted by what seems to be the current popular thing to do. Yup, speaking from personal exerience here. :-}

I love Challenges. I find them fun, motivating and well... challenging. ;-)  And when I first started this blog, they helped me tremendously. They added not only accountability and inspiration to my journey, but also an element of fun and companionship. So, I am "pro-challenges". Heck, I've even led a couple!

Having said that, lately I find that I have turned a corner. I don't know if it's temporary or permanent. All I know is that right now, I need to do this for ME totally, not for a Challenge. Not because I have to report in, or be held accountable, or meet a deadline, etc, etc.

I've written and re-written this next sentence several times... I'm finding it hard to explain.

I want my choices to be so important, 
so valuable to me that I do well 
FOR ME... 
and it doesn't matter who else knows. 

  • If everyone else decided to never do another challenge, I want to be so dedicated to my own healthy journey that it wouldn't matter one bit to me.

  • If everyone else reached their goals and quit blogging, I want to be so totally committed to reaching my own best level of health possible, that I persevere no matter what.

  • If everyone else found their true joy in life and stopped focusing on weight loss, I want to feel at peace within myself that it's okay, because I have made this a priority and answer to only ME.

Okay, those are extreme examples, but you get what I mean, I hope. :-)

I remember years ago reading something to the effect that the true measure of a person is revealed not in what they did when someone was watching, but what they did in private, when they knew NO ONE was watching. 

That's what I'm talking about... I want to have that kind of determination, deep down in my heart, that NOTHING will get in my way... even me, LOL! That I don't need to know someone will see my challenge check-in, but I am reporting to ME... and that's what counts the most.

Stuck on my computer is a little yellow post-it note, with these words from Chris at A Deliberate Life:

"The only thing standing between 
you and victory 
is you."

For several weeks now, I've watched all the Challenges gearing up for the fall and holiday seasons. And I considered joining one.

In fact, one that appealed to me the most was from Steve at Log My Loss (he requested we NOT link to him, since his site is having slow loading problems already). He is not able to personally lead the Hot 100 Challenge this year, but suggested this one: a do-it-yourself type Hot 100, referring to the last 100 days of 2011. Each person is in charge of their OWN challenge, choosing their goals and hooking up with others doing the same... deciding to end this year with a Bang. 

For those interested, here is the badge for the DIY Hot 100:

But... over and over, I keep going back to the fact that for me, at this place in my journey, I want to build up the strength to stay the course without depending upon an OUTside source of motivation. I want to cultivate that INside motivation.

Like I said, I enjoy challenges. And I am all for others doing them, if that's what they decide. But there is a time for all things, and for me, it's Time to embrace this journey joyfully and independently... meaning not depending upon a Challenge to carry me successfully through the holidays. But rather, because I have declared to myself, FOR myself... that I will choose what is healthy and right because I am valuing and honoring myself.

And I feel peaceful and good about that. 

From Dr Phil's book: "What I want you to focus on is requiring more of yourself, starting right now."

My verse for today: "Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!"

My quote for today: "Figure out who you are, then do it on purpose." --Dolly Parton

Enjoy the Journey,


DAY 772


M Pax said...

Yes, it's for you. You need to be comfortable and find the kernel of inspiration inside you. Nurture that, protect it, help it grow.

You've written in previous posts things you've wanted out of your life. Keep those prominently in front of your nose. I would ask myself: Is this important to me? I would answer, yes, more important than XXX -- whatever is was I wanted to do that was not the better choice.

I understand the frustration, etc ... I think we all do. Remember the saying, anything worth having isn't easy. It's not, but we can make the journey a little easier on ourselves.

Kimberley said...

I am with you Loretta! It is for me, about me...it is all ME, ME, ME!


I definitely understand where you are coming from and have been challenging myself weekly since July 11.

It started off as a challenge with a bunch of people...but I was the only one participating, so I decided to continue to do it on my own...just for me.

Go Loretta!!!

affectionforfitness said...

Hi Loretta! I view you as such an original that this is right down your alley. :D

I think we need to be a "party of one." When I go to the gym at a time when I don't know a single person, I still have an excellent time because I want to.

And I don't have that many followers and had even less a few months ago--I decided to blog my opinion even if nobody liked it! This is me. I'm quirky, opinionated, a little bit of a show-off at the gym, and everybody's cheerleader. If you like it, great! If you don't like it, also great.

For you Loretta, it's all about you, you, you and you! Have fun with that--putting yourself absolutely first!

:-) Marion

Leslie said...

Thanks for this Loretta - I GET it. Seems the best way for me to beginning undoing the work I've been doing is to join a challenge. I haven't joined one for over a year. This is an inside job, as you alluded to in your last post that also spoke loudly to me. May we all stay on the journey with kindness, persistence, compassion for ourselves. Live and let live!

Deb Willbefree said...

Yep. Sounds like a another huge step towards victory to me. Deb

Anne H said...

Lot of people- when they quit drinking, they still aren't sober. We need to make these changes from the inside out. So they will last. And we won't just switch out our demons.
Love it!

Princess Dieter said...

Accountability always involves others. Always. But change and exerting will always comes from the inside first and foremost.

The church, the perfect atmosphere created by God for human transformation, starts inside (faith/grace/Holy Spirit), but uses the accountability structure of elders/pastors and congregants. We confess to each other. We're exhorted by others. We submit to others. Others submit to us. We share. We support. We use gifts to empower and edify. Growth, in God's eyes, is always a combination of internal and external. Always.

So, I use challenges for weight loss the way I would use the resources of the church for spiritual and personal growth in God. Others have words and teachings and gifts to imparto help me change the INSIDE. Others support me when I fall. I support others when they fall. I share what I can with others.

One must work one's inner strength. One must rely on the powers given to others. I see that as the God-created social-beingness of humans.

For even God is not just One. He is Three. And Always interacts with Himself, eternally in fellowship, eternal in unity.

Well, that's how I see it. :D I can't just be accountable to me. I'm accountable to God, to my husband, to others. And I extend that to weight loss. Starts within me, but allows for the support of those around.

God bless, babe, on your journey.

carla said...

I LOVE that quote and have heard it said about moral character as well.
so so so so so very true.



Sugar Bush Primitives said...

I totally get what you mean. For the last few months, my daughters and I have kind of supported each other, but one is now pregnant and the other isn't really into the the "let's cheer each other on" thing. I feel like, once again, I am on my own and I need to learn to be okay with that. Sometimes it is really hard, but we will get there!


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