MAY 13th Musings on My 1000th Day Since Blogstart

Good morning Journal,

Today I went to China and watched Jeffrey Hessing paint! Well... through the magic of video. :-) 

I adore Jeffrey and his paintings. His love of color and life and beauty. The way he sees and FEELS a painting.

If I had the means and opportunity to take only one workshop in my life, it would be with him as my mentor.

(A detail from my favorite painting of his, titled "Lijiang"; 

the complete painting may be seen Here, 

under Example paintings/China) 

As I watched the video titled Hessing in Hangzhou on his website, showing Jeffrey float along the shoreline painting at an easel rigged up on the little boat, I kind of envied his ability to travel so much. He loves painting on location. Being influenced by the LIFE of his surroundings... absorbing that life into himself and then out it comes onto his joyfully colorful canvases!

Right now, until I gain strength, I spend most of my days in my power chair. I currently can't go anywhere unless Jim is there to help load and unload my chair, and take me. So my life, my world, is here at home most of the time.

But guess what? With Jim and Joey gone camping, it's been quiet and peaceful, and I've gone out into the backyard and just sat, looking.

And absorbing MY surroundings. 

Hearing at least 6 different bird calls. 

Seeing all the spring growth, and the riot of colors in nature. 

Our backyard is huge to me, surrounded on all sides with a privacy fence and many tall trees and shrubs in site. It felt like I was in a park!

And I was overwhelmed with gratitude for this wonderful and beautiful home. 

It was a miracle the way it worked out that we could actually buy it about 4 years ago, with no money down, and I am very aware of how blessed we are. 

Here is my "park", from left to right. (can click pics to enlarge)


We have nice neighbors on all three sides who also appreciate their privacy. Oh, and Joey loves it too, because all three neighbors have doggies that come out to "talk" and play with her through the fence. :-D

Left corner (edge of house at left of pic)

This is where Joey greets a little girl Maltese daily.

Middle of left side; Joey hides her 

best chews behind this huge bush.

Farther down to left corner of yard.

Looking up above the back fence, and

a little to the rt of the little storage shed.

Smack in the middle of the back fence.

Beyond this fence lives half a dozen little
black and white Boston Terriers that race 
around and get Joey totally jazzed every 
day! And if she needed any MORE reason

to be excitable, in that reddish bush, about 
7 feet above the ground, is a birdie nest 
with 3 baby Blue Jays and noisy 
protective Mama Blue Jay!

And this is the rt corner and rt side fence. 
Beyond this fence live 2 HUGE dogs who 
wag their huge tails when tiny Joey bounces
over to greet them every day. So funny!

Even the kitties get to come outside in their

"playpen" and enjoy the grass and sun.

I wish my Mom could have seen my dream home... she would have loved my backyard.

Happy Mother's Day, Momma.

Loretta

on Day 1000

MAY 12th A Love Affair!

Hi Journal & Friends,

Okay, sorry. I couldn't resist that teaser title! I just wanted to share what a wonderful time I'm having. 

I've been doing what is popularly called "inner healing" work, and it's been amazing, powerful and surprising. 

And I really feel like I AM having a love affair... with God! In a most glorious and holy sense. I "met" Him in 1975. My life was forever changed... yet I still overate. Many things changed... but not my habit of using food inappropriately.

Over the years our relationship weathered all kinds of storms... the typical highs and lows of life. Yet He was always there for me. Nuthin special about ME... it was Him and His love. He's just that way. :-)

A couple of days ago I stumbled upon a book I read years ago called "The Sacred Romance", by Brent Curtis & John Eldredge. I dusted it off and glanced through it, and was swept back in time to when I first read it. Tears welled up as I remembered the feelings I had when I read it. What an experience! Changed forever the way I saw me, God, the yearning of our hearts, His love for me/us. 

Part of the blurb on the back of the book says: 

"The Sacred Romance invites us to see what God is doing behind the scenes of our lives to woo us to Himself. A glimpse of His wild beauty arouses our desire and puts us on a journey to capture or be captured by love..."

Please... if anyone is open to looking at things a bit differently than normal, this is the book for you. Not churchy or preachy. Simply beautiful! You can buy a used copy on Amazon for 1 penny plus shipping, and it'll be one of the most loving things you ever did for yourself! 

Well... that's not what I had intended to write! LOL!

I meant to say that during this inner healing work, I've felt so wrapped up in Love, and so totally supported by God, and feeling like all shame and guilt over what I did to myself has been peeled away and healed. I feel free from it, totally. And in it's place is this cuddly soft cashmere wrap of Understanding, Encouragement and Love.

Yep, I'm having a wonderful time. I'm following the lessons in a book I recently finished reading. I'm so new to it, that I hesitate to write all about it yet. I'm no expert, that's a for sure! But if there is interest here, I suppose will.

(Joey about to exit her doggie door)

Jim and Joey are on vacation, camping out. Jim called and said it was chilly at night, and that Joey immediately crawled INSIDE the sleeping bag with him. 

So it's all quiet here on the home front. I think that is why I was able to just quiet myself and see some of this breakthrough progess. :-)

(Joey was raised with 2 kitties who like to get up on things. 

I think Joey must think she is a cat!)

My book quote for today: "The true story of every person in this world is not the story you see, the external story. The true story of each person is the journey of his or her heart." --Curtis & Eldredge, The Sacred Romance

My verse for today: "The Lord is God, and he has made his light shine upon us."

My quote for today: "Be like the bird who, pausing on her flight on limb too slight, feel it give way beneath her, yet sings, knowing she hath wings." --Victor Hugo

Enjoy the inner Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 999

MAY 5th A Launch Party!

Hi Journal & Friends,

I'm excited today to tell you about a fellow Oregonian, M. Pax, who is also a favorite author of mine. Mary was one of the first people on the interwebs who encouraged me when I started this blog. 

And I'm tickled to see she incorporated some of the art I did for her in the book's cover art. If you can see it, the face shimmering in the sky is taken from a painting I did that included an image of Craze, the main character of her book.

I'm so happy I could join her Launch Party for her first book in a series: The Backworlds

The Backworlds is here!

The first story in the Backworlds series by M. Pax. A vision of how humanity might colonize the galaxy some day in the distant future.

The Backworlds

After the war with Earth, bioengineered humans scatter across the Backworlds. Competition is fierce and pickings are scant. Scant enough that Craze’s father decides to hoard his fortune by destroying his son. Cut off from family and friends, with little money, and even less knowledge of the worlds beyond his own, Craze heads into an uncertain future. Boarding the transport to Elstwhere, he vows to make his father regret this day.

Available from: Amazon / AmazonUK / Smashwords / Feedbooks

Other links to more outlets can be found at either Wistful Nebulae or MPax 

The Backworlds is an ebook and a free read. All formats can be found at Smashwords and Feedbooks.

It’ll take a few weeks to work its way down to free on Amazon Kindle. It will also be available on B&N and iTunes. Sign up for M. Pax’s mailing list to be notified the day it does go free on Amazon, and when the book becomes available at other outlets. You’ll also receive coupons for discounts on future publications. NEWSLETTER 

M. Pax’s inspiration comes from the wilds of Oregon, especially the high desert where she shares her home with two cats and a husband unit. Creative sparks also come from Pine Mountain Observatory where she spend her summers working as a star guide. She writes mostly science fiction and fantasy, but confesses to an obsession with Jane Austen. She blogs at her website, www.mpaxauthor.com and at Wistful Nebuae. You’ll find links there to connect on Twitter, Goodread, FB and other sites.

The sequel, Stopover at the Backworlds’ Edge, will be released in July 2012. It will be available in all ebook formats and paperback.

Happy reading,

Loretta

=^..^=

Day 992

MAY 1st I'm Baaack!

Hello Journal & Friends,

I had a wonderful bloggy vacation! I even restrained myself from spouting off in a post when the urge hit... once. ;-)

As I started to write this, I stumbled upon the "pray for wisdom list" I made back on April 13th. It was for me and 6 others. I have been praying daily, sometimes more than once, for wisdom for us all. But... I had forgotten what I wrote next to MY name. :-O

Here it is:

April 13th, starting to see that I can choose which "restriction" I use as a tool. And if I want to stop counting calories, all I need to do is use "hunger/fullness" signals as prompts and ACCEPT them as my tool to control amounts. That would be all I need to do, just one thing, since I already make my choices from low carb, and don't eat sugar/flour now. Just one thing! How simple. :-)

Yeah right... how simple!! 

Well, on my "blogcation" I didn't count calories... not a one. I really did want to test this "theory". Was I ready for it? Was it too soon? Was I fooling myself? Was I making excuses cuz I was just plain tired of the hassle of counting?

How did I do?

April 1 weigh in: 332

May 1 weigh in:  321

Meaning a loss for April of 11 pounds. 

Pretty good for this ol' dog!

Hey, I think I'm on to sumpthin!! Perhaps I've finally turned the corner. I've done this whole deal long enough to know how, what, why, etc etc, ad nauseam. 

I had to ACCEPT the restriction, and stop fighting it. 

So all during my "time off" from blogging about it, I shifted my focus to my WHY. 

Yes, I did blog a little, but it was at my art blog (here).  I focused on my true passion, my reason for wanting to get healthy and lose this weight. I plan to continue this pattern for the most part, and see if it truly is where I need to be now, where this leg of the journey is leading me. I'm excited!

And this is for anyone who did NOT have a stellar April... hang in there, your time is a-coming. 

My book quote for today: "Find what works best for you. Always remember that you are trying to master yourself, not find a master for you." --Richard Machowicz, Unleash The Warrior Within

My verse for today: "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy."

My quote for today: "I am still far from being what I want to be, but with God's help I shall succeed." --Vincent Van Gogh

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 988

APRIL 10th ReCharge & ReFocus Time

Hi Journal & Friends,

I've been wanting to do something for myself for years and years, yet always put it off, thinking it should be "earned". Such as a reward for when I got to X amount of weight loss.

Last week, I realized that I was worth it NOW. Sure, goals with little rewards along the way are fun. But this was different. I felt almost punished for having to wait so long. So... I did it. What did I do??

I couple of weeks ago, I went to a "real" hair salon and got my hair cut by a "real" hairdresser. Then last week I returned and had her put in "real" caramel highlights. 

It might not sound like a big deal to some of you, but it's been over THIRTY YEARS since I darkened the doors of what we used to call a Beauty Parlor. And I was nervous. But she was so nice and patient, and I feel maaahhhavelous that I did it!

Here are before pics:

And here's the after:

It doesn't look like "my" idea of caramel, but I like it fine. Maybe next time I should take a "paint chip" in with me. :-D 

Lastly, I just wanted to mention that I plan on taking the rest of April off from this blog, and do some thinking and catching up. 

I'm excited and motivated, and want to do some long-term planning. I might pop in occasionally to read a few blogs, and will try to keep up with my art blog (Here)  . And I'll probably sneak a peek on Facebook (my Facebook page)  now and then... but my intent is to hugely reduce my computer time. 

So... I hope you all have a wonderful April. I sure plan to! See all you wonderful people in May.

My book quote for today: "Being a warrior is not about the act of fighting. It's about being so prepared to face a challenge and believing so strongly in the cause you are fighting for that you refuse to quit." --Richard Machowicz, Unleash The Warrior Within

My verse for today: "Blessed are the people whose God is the Lord."

My quote for today:  "If you want to get there, you can't be a shrinking violet." --Craig Sigl

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 967

APRIL 6th Our Video Is Here!

Hello Journal & Friends,

I'm excited! It's here... the long anticipated video made especially for us by Coach Dayne, from Coach Your Mind! 

On January 1st of this year, I took a Poll (Here), asking what YOU all would like to see included in his video. Coach Dayne teaches on having a winning mindset, on choosing to be the 1%.. that minority of people who decide that failure, mediocrity and defeatist attitude are not what they want. Who are willing to do the work, to be teachable, and to never ever quit. To believe their goals are possible... thus making it probable that they WILL achieve them. It's for those who decide they are not willing to settle for less any more! 

Does that describe you??

I'm making the choice that it DOES describe me. I'm not going by feelings, I'm choosing it. I. want. it. 

Well, Coach Dayne read your answers to the poll, and we now have the video! Before I give the link to the video (I'm having problems with blogspot letting me embed videos, thus the need for a link) I wanted to let you in on something else Coach Dayne is up to: he's now posting short audio talks on Soundcloud, which also appear on Facebook. If you sign up, Soundcloud will notify you when a new audio is available. 

The audios are short and to the point, and I'm loving them. I already saw one thing I was NOT doing right in visualizing my goals... and that's only after listening to two! Here is the link to Coach Dayne's Soundcloud page.  

Okay, drumroll... here's the long awaited:

 VIDEO ON YOUTUBE link. 

I already took a peek at it, and I am so jazzed! I heard something clearly this time I had been fuzzy on before, and that's exciting to me. 

Need a reason to watch the video? Here's my short summary:

--talks about keys to keeping the kind of powerful motivation that will bust through barriers

--how to super-charge your motivation so it sustains you

--describes the kind of "WHY" needed and what to attach to it in order to make it powerful and solid, so nothing will stop you

--how to separate from the "average" and achieve your goals, to become the 1%

Thank you, Coach Dayne. I appreciate this greatly.

My book quote for today: "What is it like, they ask me, to commit every fiber, every molecule of being, to completing a goal? How do you train yourself to not ever consider the option of quitting under the most stressful situations?" --Richard Machowicz, Unleash the Warrior Within

My verse for today: "I will sing praise to my God as long as I live."

My quote for today: "You control virtually every aspect of this journey." --Jack, at Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit 

Enjoy the Journey,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 963

APRIL 2nd I'm Still Alive!

Hi Journal & Friends,

Sunday night I had a dream.

I died.

It wasn't scary or morbid or anything like that. But man, it was so real! It came unexpected, and swift. There was a LOT to the dream, and I remember exactly what I said when I realized I was "there" and not "here" any longer: "But I'm not finished".

Like I said, there was a whole lot more. But the take away messages for ME was this:

None of us know when our time is done here. So live to our fullest NOW.

There is Love there. But also make sure you live in Love here, and NOW.

I feel in my heart I am not finished here yet, so I want to not waste any time NOW.

Master the Now!

Just yesterday (Sunday) I watched a video on Coach Dayne's blog, Coach Your Mind.  The line I wrote down from the video to remember was: Master the now!  I can see how that also worked itself into my dream.

I was going to write a whiny post about how I gained 3 lbs last month, and how I'm going to work harder, yadda yadda yadda. Well, it kinda pales in significance to dying!! Yes, I AM getting my rear in gear. And getting on with this. But not "to lose weight". That will be a great side benefit.

I want to get on with the program and lose the weight so I CAN live now, so I can finish my business here. So I can give that love NOW, in my own way.

Wow, what a dream!! 

I woke up early, feeling excited and bursting with energy and renewed motivation! Now... to add the ACTION to that motivation.

My book quote for today: "You can always do more than you think, you can always go a lot farther than you think." --Richard Machowicz, Unleash The Warrior Within

My verse for today: "But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more and more."

My quote for today: "Success isn't a destination, it's a belief. Belief isn't taught, it's decided. When will you decide?" --Dayne Gingrich

Enjoy the Journey as long as it lasts,

Loretta

=^..^=

DAY 959